Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

People in my real life annoy me, so I come online to annoy you.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has copied:

I don’t know why hair extensions are exclusive to women, I want to look like a centaur.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has downloaded:

A two-year old is kind of like having a blender, but you don’t have a top for it.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has downloaded:

Just found out my 84-year-old neighbour is on his own tomorrow, so I’ve just been over to collect his spare chairs to borrow.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

Reading fanfics is so fun, I wish romantic attraction was real.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has downloaded:

Pinky promises are still a legit foundation of trust.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has bookmarked:

Social media is proof that even mental hospitals have WiFi.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has bookmarked:

Adulthood is just saying “it is what it is,” and then crying in your car to a song from 2012.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has downloaded:

When I die, I hope I’m remembered for my ability to take any bad situation and make it worse.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,583

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Slack:

Whoever first said, “I’m in a pickle,” must have had the weirdest day.

Just landed via Threads:

Cocktails can be tricky, because they taste like juice, but then the next thing you know… you can’t walk.

Live now on Slack:

That’s me in the corner, that’s me in the spotlight, spreading goat cheese on a bagel.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

I truly wonder what it sounded like when Medusa washed her hair at night.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Give us this day our daily internet validation.

Just shared via Telegram:

Husband said he only wants to allow our kids to watch Looney Tunes and nothing else because of the “moral lessons”.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

A driver that delivers Indian food is called a curryer.

Making waves on X:

“I’m at a point in my life where my favorite thing to do is nothing.”

Shared recently on Discord:

Of course I do cardio. It’s called running from my problems.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Woke up, twerked in the mirror and laid back down.

My brain doesn’t sea typos until I’ve already hit send.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Autocorrect is my worst enema… I mean, enemy. 🤦‍♂️🌊 Don't worry, typos happen to the breast of us!"

awareness, brain, communication, hit, humor, mistake, sea, send, typo, writing

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Release that sexual frustration, get a burger.

0

2 months ago

appetite, burger, date, food, frustration, fun, humor, release
OK, just so everybody’s clear, I’m going to put my glasses on.

0

2 months ago

clarity, clear, communication, eyewear, glasses, going, humor, just, ok, put
Muting morons is good for your health.

0

2 months ago

good, health, humor, moron, muting, positivity, self-care, wellness
People my age are doing so much, and I’m just at home reliving the same day over and over again.

0

5 months ago

again, age, boredom, day, doing, home, humor, just, much, over, people, repetition, routine, same, self-reflection
I get easily confused in the morning. Also in the afternoon and evening.

0

2 months ago

afternoon, confused, confusion, daily, daily life, easily, evening, humor, i, life, morning, tiredness
Apologies about the delay to your flight. We’re just waiting for one 3D printed part, but apparently a ‘fuselage’ takes a little time.

0

2 months ago

3d, 3D printing, apology, aviation, delay, flight, flight delay, fuselage, humor, just, little, maintenance, printing, time, waiting

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

49 shares on TikTok this month:

The word “misread” can be misread as “misread.”

68 shares on Pinterest this month:

One thing I love about the internet is seeing some of the most hateful people posting inspirational quotes.

81 shares on Snapchat this month:

Yabba dabba doo used to be a rad way to start a Saturday.

74 shares on Twitch this month:

The worst part of online shopping is having to get up and get your card out of your wallet.

38 shares on Threads this month:

“Do something with your life.” Um, I am. Have you heard of a little thing called squandering?

51 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Today I broke my personal record for most consecutive days lived.

52 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Every cat is a little celebrity to me.

96 shares on Reddit this month:

A woman’s sigh can speak a 1000 words.

26 shares on Discord this month:

Everyone on the bus thinks that they are the main character, when in reality the main character is the bus.

71 shares on X this month:

My body snaps, crackles, and pops louder than my cereal.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇸 has copied:

A dating app called Unhinged where you agree to meet up and fight each other.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has shared:

I hate being responsible for my own meals because I’ll either spoil myself or starve for most of the day.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

Not sure how to flirt, but I can make things awkward if you’re into that.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has shared:

A 20% discount sounds great until you realize you can’t afford the other 80%

Someone from 🇵🇬 has copied:

Nighty night! Don’t let the horror of existence bite.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has bookmarked:

Tupperware is a fun way to store your leftovers until you throw them away.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has shared:

I wonder how many different vegetables they exploded before they discovered popcorn.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

Late replies don’t bother me. As long as we’re not in love, or you don’t owe me money, take your time.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has viewed:

As an exorcist, whenever I hear of some new poor soul possessed by a demon, all I can think is Ka-Ching!

Someone from 🇬🇳 has copied:

They’re releasing another “Jurassic” movie. Let me guess: The dinosaurs get loose.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Threads:

I’ve worn oversized T-shirts so much that I suffocate if I wear one that actually fits.

Just shared via Twitch:

When you see a squirrel, you’re bound to say, “Awww, a squirrel!”

Shared recently on Instagram:

I lost my job at NASA Mission Control today. I misheard when they said, “It’s lunch time.”

Shared recently on WeChat:

My brain has too many tabs open.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

Menstruation is bizarre. It’s like something David Lynch would have came up with.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Did you know if you hold your ear up to a stranger’s leg, you can actually hear them say, ‘What the hell are you doing?’

Going viral on Telegram:

Dark mode changed me. White screens now feel like staring into the sun.

Just shared via Discord:

When science finally locates the center of the universe, some people will be surprised to learn they’re not it.

Going viral on Reddit:

When my wife packs for a trip she basically moves out.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Blaming the full moon for whatever unhinged decision I make tonight.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

My brain doesn’t sea typos until I’ve already hit send.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Release that sexual frustration, get a burger.

OK, just so everybody’s clear, I’m going to put my glasses on.

Muting morons is good for your health.

People my age are doing so much, and I’m just at home reliving the same day over and over again.

I get easily confused in the morning. Also in the afternoon and evening.

Apologies about the delay to your flight. We’re just waiting for one 3D printed part, but apparently a ‘fuselage’ takes a little time.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨