Wordgag ใƒ„

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡พ has shared:

I was the most patient parent and then I had kids.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡จ has shared:

I just looked over at my new shoes and the box says โ€œveganโ€. Iโ€™ve never had to feed my other shoes before.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ฑ has copied:

My wallet is like an onion; opening it makes me cry.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ท๐Ÿ‡ด has viewed:

A DM? Flirt on the timeline like a real man.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡บ has shared:

Every single bad day happened because I woke up.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ซ๐Ÿ‡ท has downloaded:

Are you stupid, sand? You could just lay here forever on this beautiful beach, but no, you have to try with all you’ve got, to get into my shoes.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ณ๐Ÿ‡ฎ has downloaded:

My favorite part of Spring is its rolls.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡ณ has copied:

Humming & dancing while I plop my meds into my weekly pill counter like the happy little nutcase I am.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ has viewed:

I love you to the refrigerator and back.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ณ๐Ÿ‡ฆ has viewed:

I need a chiropractor for my brain.

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

729 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,891

Funny Quotes Topics

13,867

Funny Quotes Images

10,891

Updated

59 minutes ago

Users Online

3,427

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Breaking via X:

That moment when you realize โ€œyeah, this person is never gonna hear from me againโ€ is so crazy.

Trending via Pinterest:

I had big plans to sleep in today, but my bladder canceled.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

Could you set a lightsaber on low and use it as a back scratcher?

Live now on TikTok:

Good morning, especially if they tried to make you go to rehab and you said “no, no, no.”

Spotted on X:

I think my bank account has been taking Ozempic.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

If I got $5 every time I thought of you, I would start thinking of you.

Shared recently on X:

The only thing that has grown faster than rents in recent years is the overtime we have to work to pay them.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

No, itโ€™s totally fine, Grandma. Nobody else needs to use the stairs today.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

I find it extremely hard to believe that you’re rolling on the floor laughing.

Broadcasted on Discord:

Twitter is basically everyoneโ€™s therapistโ€™s couch.

Next to nothing is a weird place.

Next to nothing is a weird place.
Download image โ†“

Commentary:
"Being in a state of 'next to nothing' is like straddling the fine line between existence and being a mysterious ninja ghost ๐Ÿ‘ป. It's the limbo where your wallet feels after a shopping spree but before payday ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ’ธ. Welcome to the weird neighborhood of scarcity and surreal possibilities! ๐Ÿšถโ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿคทโ€โ™€๏ธ"

, , , , , , ,

Related Funny Quotes ๐Ÿค

Trending Funny Quotes ๐Ÿ‘‡

New Funny Quotes
Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! ๐Ÿ˜‰โœŒ๏ธ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ’ฅ

Trending Funny Quotes ๐Ÿ“ˆ

Hot Funny Quotes ๐Ÿ”ฅ

Trending Topics ๐Ÿ“

activity communication day food fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology think time want work

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

729 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,891

Funny Quotes Topics

13,867

Funny Quotes Images

10,891

Updated

59 minutes ago

Users Online

3,429

Funny Quotes of the Month ๐Ÿš€

Funny Quotes of the Year โญ

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ท has bookmarked:

Boobs always win. That’s why we don’t play rock, paper, boobs.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ญ๐Ÿ‡น has copied:

I tried counting sheep so I can fall asleep but that got boring, so I started talking to the shepherd instead.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ณ has shared:

Introducing two cats is tedium. Not interested in your dumb politics just lick each other and be normal already.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ฐ has viewed:

When I say Iโ€™m tired, the โ€œof peopleโ€ is silent.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฑ๐Ÿ‡ฐ has shared:

Welcome to your 40sโ€ฆ you can now use this as an excuse not to help a friend move.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ญ has viewed:

People that tell us what sex gods they are, what do you want us to do with that information?

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡ฟ has viewed:

It sucks when you have to stand on an escalator for 30 minutes because of a power cut.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡ท has bookmarked:

No, itโ€™s totally fine, Grandma. Nobody else needs to use the stairs today.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ท has viewed:

November moving quicker than two lesbians who met three days ago.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ฆ has viewed:

Sex is cool but have you ever had a king size bed all to yourself.

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Shared recently on Messenger:

I’m not starting a presentation with “ladies and gentlemen”, I’m using the gender neutral “to those who heed my warnings”.

Making waves on Threads:

Jealous that my phone can just die for a little while.

Breaking via Reddit:

Some stupid little amoeba decided to leave the ocean a billion years ago and now I have to worry about Monday.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

I hate it when some random company refers to me as their โ€œcustomer.โ€ Iโ€™m like, look, we had one night of drunken shopping, we are not in a relationship.

Live now on Threads:

I took the road less traveled. Where am I?

Going viral on Twitch:

In my defense, they burned my grilled cheese sandwich.

Spotted on Slack:

True bravery is getting a text from a woman with three questions in it, and only responding to one.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

โ€œYou handled it so well.โ€ Nah, I didnโ€™t. I lost my spark, felt crazy, distanced myself from everyone, and hated myself.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

My dog sighs a lot for someone who doesnโ€™t pay any bills.

Just shared via Reddit:

Twitter is like a mental hospital where everyone thinks they are the only sane person and everyone else is crazy.

Share Wordgag ๐Ÿ™

ยฉ 2025. All fights retarded. ๐Ÿคช

Made with โค๏ธ in Sydney โ˜€๏ธ๐ŸŒด