Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Who needs designer bags when you can store all your grudges in your pockets? 🤷‍♀️👜 Don't mess with a woman and her pocketful of grievances! 💁‍♀️💼 #GrudgeStorage #PocketPower"

course, fashion, grudges, hold, humor, need, pockets, stereotypes, where, women

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62 shares on LinkedIn this month:

It’s a little ironic when you consider that the Internet was invented to save time.

46 shares on Threads this month:

One of my greatest strengths is appearing busy so people don’t try to speak to me.

44 shares on Pinterest this month:

Maybe God will gift me a boyfriend for my birthday this year.

35 shares on Reddit this month:

Robert De Niro always looks like he just smelled a nasty fart.

49 shares on WeChat this month:

First you’re cringe, then you’re the blueprint.

61 shares on Telegram this month:

You can put refrigerator magnets on your car, too. There are no rules.

20 shares on Pinterest this month:

“Are you seeing someone?” Like a hallucination, therapist, or a guy?

56 shares on Pinterest this month:

Stay up till 4 a.m. one night, and your sleep schedule is ruined for the next 4 years.

48 shares on Twitch this month:

Ever since I was a little girl, I have loved staying up really late, hanging out with myself, and thinking about stuff and things.

69 shares on Twitch this month:

No one suddenly needs anything more than a kid whose mom has just sat down and gotten comfortable.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇮 has viewed:

Three serious exes is the right amount before you meet your spouse. You need one truly evil one, one normal one, and one situationship, and then you’ve basically experienced all dating has to offer.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

I’ve got nothing against kids, I just don’t understand why you’d want indoor kids.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has downloaded:

Why don’t straight men and lesbians hang out like straight women and gays do?

Someone from 🇬🇲 has copied:

They said don’t try this at home, so I’m coming over to your place.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has viewed:

Boss: Why do I have to always come and find you? Me: Because a good employee is hard to find.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has downloaded:

David Attenborough narrating my life: “He’s still sleeping.”

Someone from 🇯🇵 has viewed:

I’ve realized that some people don’t like me, but I’ve also realized that I don’t give a shit.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has copied:

Be the nonsense you wish to see in the world.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has downloaded:

Called in, “I can either stay home today and learn to play this accordion or bring it in with me. Your call.”

Someone from 🇦🇿 has shared:

I’m either at work, going to work, coming home from work, sleeping for work, getting ready for work, or thinking about work.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Sunday is my favorite day to invent new things to worry about.

Just shared via Threads:

Why’s it always “NYC smells like pee” and never “my pee smells like the greatest city in the world”?

Just shared via Facebook:

In my defense, they burned my grilled cheese sandwich.

Making waves on WeChat:

I’m not like other girls. I don’t have a podcast.

Spotted on Slack:

Not being able to teleport is a huge inconvenience for me.

Trending via YouTube:

The real reason for global warming is that today’s young people are nowhere near as cool as we were back then.

Shared recently on Discord:

I fondly remember my days as a younger man when I didn’t care what the weather was going to do.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

I hope we’re good friends until we die, then I hope we can stay ghost friends, walk through walls and scare people.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

I have no prime. I will evolve till I die.

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Activity Log ✨

Of course women need more pockets, where are we supposed to hold all of our grudges?

I used to judge cat owners for giving in to their pets’ whims too easily, but holy shit, these animals are relentless and would starve themselves to organ failure just because one time, weeks ago, they had a taste of some ‘better’ food.

Doc, if I can vibecode anything and everyone else can vibecode anything, then what’s my competitive advantage?

The real advantage of being self-employed is that you don’t have to go to a Christmas party.

Women watch Netflix with subtitles because they don’t know how to listen.

Being an adult is spending every day looking at a pill bottle, wondering, “Did I take this already?”

Partying hard on this Friday night, and by partying hard, I mean laying on my bed starfish-style.

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Wordgag ツ

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Of course women need more pockets, where are we supposed to hold all of our grudges?

Keep the laugh going 😂

I used to judge cat owners for giving in to their pets’ whims too easily, but holy shit, these animals are relentless and would starve themselves to organ failure just because one time, weeks ago, they had a taste of some ‘better’ food.

Doc, if I can vibecode anything and everyone else can vibecode anything, then what’s my competitive advantage?

The real advantage of being self-employed is that you don’t have to go to a Christmas party.

Women watch Netflix with subtitles because they don’t know how to listen.

Being an adult is spending every day looking at a pill bottle, wondering, “Did I take this already?”

Partying hard on this Friday night, and by partying hard, I mean laying on my bed starfish-style.

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