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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

Co-worker: You look so unapproachable. Me: Yet, here you are.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has bookmarked:

I noticed you haven’t posted in a few weeks, and just wanted to thank you.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has downloaded:

Imagine the carnage at an IKEA team building event.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has bookmarked:

Sorry, I booped your nose, but I was really hoping it was a mute button.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has downloaded:

Do other people remember toasters with wings flying across our computer screens or was that a fever dream I just had?

Someone from 🇷🇴 has copied:

I wonder what the part of my brain that used to store people’s phone numbers is doing now.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has downloaded:

My brain has too many tabs open.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has shared:

Source? It was revealed to me on my walk.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has downloaded:

The good news is that I’ve been finding new ways to waste my time.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has downloaded:

Saving up ketchup packets in the fridge so I can one day open my own restaurant.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,440

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Rappers be making you feel guilty for no reason at all: “You was in the house eating dinner while I was in the streets hungry”. Like my fault, bro.

Spotted on TikTok:

The question is, what will kill humanity this century? Artificial intelligence or natural stupidity?

Seen just now on X:

I fall in love with a song and play it until I absolutely don’t wanna hear it no more.

Live now on YouTube:

“Pre” means before, and “post” means after. Using both at the same time would be preposterous.

Going viral on Threads:

The female ability to be able to guess exactly which girl it is out of his 740 following.

Making waves on Telegram:

Warning: not watching the news may lead to a heightened sense of joy, security, and optimism.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Girls flirt by orbiting your general location like an electron.

Shared recently on Twitch:

I took some free community martial arts lessons for self-defense, but I’m starting to think Tai Chi is too slow for most muggers.

Spotted on YouTube:

I’m never wrong. Just different levels of right.

Going viral on Reddit:

People don’t hate working, they hate working and still being poor.

Silence is my favourite form of communication in the morning.

0
Silence is my favourite form of communication in the morning.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
Ah yes, the morning symphony of silence—I feel you on a spiritual level 😂☕😴

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

51 shares on Twitch this month:

People who wear jeans for fun around their house have bodies buried in their backyard.

49 shares on TikTok this month:

If you think I’m evil, wait until you meet the man who made me this way.

88 shares on YouTube this month:

Beds are always the coziest when it’s time to get up and you don’t want to.

76 shares on TikTok this month:

The neighbor sneezes loudly from the balcony. And because I’m a polite person, I shout loudly: Disgusting!

44 shares on WeChat this month:

I used to have a great future in my past.

24 shares on Pinterest this month:

We can do things two ways. My way or the right way.

77 shares on Reddit this month:

Flies are literally obsessed with flying into a room, then pretending they can’t get out. Grow up.

50 shares on Pinterest this month:

Quitting my job to focus on watching YouTube.

84 shares on Facebook this month:

Please text me back. I’m about to start making stuff up in my head, and the stuff is all bad.

36 shares on Telegram this month:

Imagine how bored the person who invented mayonnaise must have been.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Honey, get in the car. We have to go to the store because we’re retarded, and it’s Christmas Eve.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

You ever want someone so bad it pisses you off a little.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Breakfast is the most important beer of the day.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I need a new hobby that costs zero dollars and takes up 100% of my free time. So far, all I’ve come up with is mowing the lawn.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I bought a robot vacuum today. Named it “Dustbin Bieber”.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

That gap between Christmas and New Year’s when you can’t tell what day of the week it is.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Goodnight Outlook, goodnight Teams, goodnight Zoom.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Flying bugs can basically go anywhere they want, but still choose to fly right into your face.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

At my age, you check a friend’s Facebook page to make sure they’re still alive before wishing them a happy birthday.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

My parents didn’t raise me to order something expensive when someone else is paying.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,604

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇫 has viewed:

I switched from coffee to orange juice and told my doctor I felt better. He said it’s the vitamin C and natural sugars, but I think it’s the vodka.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has bookmarked:

I never finish what I start. I have a black belt in partial arts.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has copied:

The sun is so successful because it has the perfect bedtime and morning routines.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has viewed:

Vanilla perfumes are so nice. It’s like walking into a bakery but you are the bakery.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has downloaded:

My Mom asks why everything is on the floor, like she never heard of gravity.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

I hate everyone in front of me at this checkout line, everyone behind me is cool.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has viewed:

I’ve been ghosted enough to add paranormal investigator to my resume.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has copied:

A haunted house, but it’s just a room full of people asking you to tell them a fun fact about yourself.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

My superpower? Staying calm when talking to idiots.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has viewed:

Babe, are you okay? You haven’t touched your dark humor all day.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Reddit:

Trying to explain that I’m fascinated by Japan for wood joinery reasons and not nerd or pervert reasons.

Seen just now on Telegram:

I want to be like a caterpillar. Eat a lot, sleep for a while, and then wake up beautiful.

Spotted on Facebook:

Returned my 3D printer, but not before making a 3D printer with it.

Just shared via WeChat:

Start every phone call with “My battery is at 5%” so you can hang up whenever you want.

Seen just now on Messenger:

No, I don’t comment, I voodoo doll like a real adult.

Just landed via Reddit:

What we need is more companies making hot sauce. I need 900 more ways to taste a thing that tastes exactly like all the other ones.

Live now on Discord:

I run every day for 30 minutes. If I miss a day, I add 30 minutes to the next day. This has truly been a game changer. Tomorrow I’m supposed to run for 3 weeks.

Freshly posted on Discord:

University is more like teaching yourself for a class you paid for.

Seen just now on X:

Might mess around and reply “history will absolve me” to all work emails.

Broadcasted on Discord:

Mentally, I’m in a forest screaming. Physically, I’m answering emails with a fake smile and clenched jaw.

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