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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇼 has copied:

Sorry I’m late. My catapult malfunctioned.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has viewed:

Do I need to have seen the Tokyo Olympics in order to understand the Paris ones?

Someone from 🇮🇸 has downloaded:

Blowing over it is also dusting.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has copied:

Pregnancy is crazy. You really come home with someone you don’t know, with no teeth.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has bookmarked:

Before ball parks were invented there was pretty much no way to give someone a rough estimate.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

Technically mixed martial arts can include tickle fighting.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

It really annoys me when people use the wrong word and don’t have the humidity to admit it.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

How do you know I’m not just a figment of your imagination?

Someone from 🇸🇻 has copied:

Nobody could stop me if I wasn’t tired all the time.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has viewed:

Y’all made fun of Plankton on Spongebob for dating a computer, and look at y’all now.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

884 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,046

Funny Quotes Topics

13,985

Funny Quotes Images

11,046

7 minutes ago

3,433

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via WeChat:

Job applications be like “how did you hear about us?”. Bro why, was it a secret?

Spotted on Instagram:

It’s really hard to come back after a poorly executed high five.

Going viral on YouTube:

Getting to know someone these days is impossible. No one is really single, everyone has something going on, is hung up on their ex or is otherwise damaged in some way.

Making waves on Twitch:

Never understood why people train their dogs to sit pretty or roll over when there are useful tricks like empty the dishwasher or fold the laundry.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

I was going to do some yoga today, but had a donut instead.

Live now on Instagram:

Flirting is easy until you have to flirt with the person you like.

Making waves on Threads:

Some of you are out here driving like your turn signal’s free trial ended and you’re all out of blinks.

Trending via YouTube:

Why be just a part of the solution when you can be the whole problem?

Spotted on WeChat:

Accidentally became important at work and it’s ruining my life.

Live now on LinkedIn:

Imagine the sound a centipede would make if they wore tiny flip flops.

Home » Funny Silence Quotes

47 Funny silence quotes

Funny silence quotes 😂 are the perfect way to break the ice and lighten the mood in any conversation. Whether you’re looking to poke fun at those awkward quiet moments 🤫 or simply want to chuckle at the absurdity of silence, these quotes offer a playful twist on the art of saying nothing. So, sit back, relax, and enjoy a hilariously quiet adventure that’ll leave you giggling in the hush! 🤭💬

New funny silence quotes 👇

4 days ago
Share →: I think it’s extremely important, especially in the morning, to be quiet.

Commentary:
Trying to be a morning person is like trying to fold a fitted sheet—best left unsaid and unseen. 🤫😴🛌
1 week ago
Share →: Sometimes I do random acts of kindness, like keeping my mouth shut, for example.

Commentary:
Silence: the greatest gift, and it's budget-friendly too! 😂🤐✨
1 week ago
Share →: All of humanity’s problems stem from man’s inability to sit quietly in a room alone.

Commentary:
Sounds like we need more practice in the ancient art of not doing anything! 🧘‍♂️🛋️😅
2 weeks ago
Share →: Moment of silence for those who received mugs that aren’t microwave- and dishwasher-safe.

Commentary:
RIP to those fancy mugs that are now just fancy dust collectors ☕️🕯️✨
2 weeks ago
Share →: I mostly stopped responding to emails three years ago, and aside from various consequences, it’s been fine.

Commentary:
"When you achieve inner peace by turning your inbox into a black hole. 🌌📭😂"
2 weeks ago
Share →: Marriage tip: If your wife goes silent in the middle of an argument, you probably shouldn’t ask if you can go back to mowing the lawn.

Commentary:
"Ha! That's the sound of your lawnmower dreaming of freedom! 🚜😅 Better put it on pause, buddy!"
3 weeks ago
Share →: A moment of silence for those who hate us but can’t unfriend us because they’re afraid of not knowing what’s happening in our lives.

Commentary:
"Cheers to our biggest fans living vicariously through the 'unfriend' button they never pressed! 🕵️‍♂️🙃 #AwkwardFrenemies"
4 weeks ago
Share →: Some things are better left unsaid, which I usually realize after I say them.

Commentary:
"Pro tip: Use the 'delay shipping' option on words! 🚚💨🤭"
1 month ago
Share →: My boyfriend talks to everyone while I stand by quietly, planning my escape.

Commentary:
"When your relationship status is 'CEO of Small Talk Evasion' 😅🚪🏃‍♀️"
2 months ago
Share →: Sorry for not keeping in touch. I literally have nothing to say.

Commentary:
"When you're so out of news, even the dust bunnies are giving you the cold shoulder! 🐇📞🤣"

For even more funny silence quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny silence quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

884 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,046

Funny Quotes Topics

13,985

Funny Quotes Images

11,046

7 minutes ago

3,423

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇸 has viewed:

At the self-checkout, I make small talk with myself and I wish I would just shut up.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has copied:

You can name literally any food or drink to the dentist and they’ll be like “ohhh, that’s actually so bad for your teeth. You should only eat water and toothpaste.”

Someone from 🇼🇸 has bookmarked:

The number one rule of Thanksgiving dinner is take your own vehicle so you can leave on your own terms.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has copied:

Once you start paying rent, every joke stops being funny.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has bookmarked:

If you say “awesome sauce” on a first date, you’ll still have that lucky condom in your wallet tomorrow.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has downloaded:

Sometimes the best thing about my job is that my chair turns.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has copied:

Robot bartender rips me in half after listening to my problems for over an hour.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has bookmarked:

My dog is quite vain. Whenever the doorbell rings, he thinks it’s for him.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has viewed:

“Doing the dishes” is completely pointless and only wastes water. You’re just going to put food on them again in a few hours.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has viewed:

I don’t mind being fully naked or my top half being naked, but I hate being naked from the waist down only. This is why I could never be a cartoon duck.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Messenger:

You think you’re your own worst critic? Just wait till you have kids.

Spotted on Snapchat:

The food hits different when it ain’t yours.

Trending via Facebook:

I love hard, but I stupid harder.

Trending via Instagram:

Forget pheromones, barbecue smells are always attractive.

Live now on LinkedIn:

Really wanted to be a therapist until I read some of your guys’ posts and problems, and I want nothing to do with that mess.

Spotted on WeChat:

Breaking news is really breaking me.

Shared recently on Reddit:

The Airbnb reviews never tell you how comfortable the toilets are for falling asleep on.

Just landed via Slack:

Met a microbiologist once. They’re a lot bigger than I imagined.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

I suffer from awesomnia.

Just landed via Twitch:

I wish I was as tired in bed at night as I am after lunch at work.

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