Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Feeling useless? Just remember, you're a CO2-producing superhero for plants! 🌿💨 Who knew your exhales had such a green thumb? Keep breathing, photosynthesis appreciates it! 🌱😄"

breathe, carbon, carbon dioxide, dioxide, humor, i, nature, plants, remember, reminder, self-worth, useless

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I grew up in a kinder, gentler age. We pitied our fools.

2 months ago

age, fool, gentler, i, kinder, pity
I’m the Usain Bolt of running late.

2 months ago

bolt, humor, late, procrastination, running, speed, usain, Usain Bolt
I’ve been so stressed about getting my shit together that I haven’t gotten any of my shit together.

2 months ago

getting, humor, i, life, motivation, procrastination, self-improvement, shit, stress, together
Coffee and more coffee is a perfect combo.

2 months ago

caffeine, coffee, combo, drink, humor, morning, perfect
Date idea: We watch Breaking Bad and break your bed.

2 months ago

activity, bad, bed, break, breaking, Breaking Bad, couple, date, fun, fun activity, humor, idea, watch
You unfollow me because you are afraid of falling in love with me. I know!

3 months ago

afraid, confidence, dating, humor, i, know, love, me, media, relationship, social, social media, unfollow

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

11 shares on Facebook this month:

I’m not tispy. I’m merry.

56 shares on Pinterest this month:

Her heart is an abandoned garden filled with ghosts and dying flowers.

22 shares on Telegram this month:

I wanna marry someone funnier than me, but sadly, I am the funniest.

82 shares on YouTube this month:

My whole life is basically a blooper reel.

59 shares on YouTube this month:

Relationship goal: synchronizing our eye rolls.

38 shares on X this month:

Shoutout to my kids because they aren’t listening!

51 shares on Pinterest this month:

Thank you all for attending my final rose ceremony. There will be no roses.

82 shares on Reddit this month:

I changed my alarm clock sound to an applause, it’s the least I deserve for waking up at 7am.

39 shares on Reddit this month:

The food hits different when it ain’t yours.

89 shares on Telegram this month:

The 80s were wild, man. You had bands naming themselves after predatory cats with hearing problems.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇿 has shared:

The cynicism of those who urge me not to do what I can to help the Nigerian royal family.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has bookmarked:

The second half of your life begins when you stop wanting to get even and start wanting to get odd.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has shared:

90% of debugging is just realizing your own stupidity in slow motion.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has copied:

Don’t be boring. Create the gossip you would like to hear.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has bookmarked:

I need to stop drinking so much. Did I say drinking? I meant thinking. I definitely need to drink more.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

Source? It was revealed to me on a walk.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has viewed:

Friendly reminder that someone having a different opinion about a movie than you is a direct attack on you as a person and you should take it very personally.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has viewed:

I don’t question my wife’s choices because I’m one of them.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has copied:

Every night, millions of teeth go unbrushed.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has downloaded:

God forbid a girl uses shopping as her coping mechanism.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on X:

What you call “Brunch” I call “Breakfast for Alcoholics.”

Making waves on WhatsApp:

If you’re worried that you added too much cheese to the recipe, I am here to reassure you that you did not.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

If you’re partying with your cousin and you’re asked if you’re related, “Our parents are siblings” will cause a lot of confusion.

Shared recently on Twitch:

I’ve decided to give people an attitude instead of gifts this year.

Trending via TikTok:

Do you ever restart the dryer because you don’t feel like folding the clothes yet?

Just shared via Snapchat:

“Doing the dishes” is completely pointless and only wastes water. You’re just going to put food on them again in a few hours.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Obituaries should have clickbait titles.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

Don’t even bother contacting me on the Ouija Board after I die. I barely answer my texts now.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Does the HDMI cord have the most dominant run of any cord ever?

Going bananas on Snapchat:

People who shower at night are bold enough to assume tomorrow’s even happening.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Sometimes I feel useless, but then I remember I breathe out carbon dioxide for plants.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I grew up in a kinder, gentler age. We pitied our fools.

I’m the Usain Bolt of running late.

I’ve been so stressed about getting my shit together that I haven’t gotten any of my shit together.

Coffee and more coffee is a perfect combo.

Date idea: We watch Breaking Bad and break your bed.

You unfollow me because you are afraid of falling in love with me. I know!

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨