Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • The thing I’ve always found tricky about money is knowing how much I should have.
  • Venmo is my favorite social media site. I love to see my boy John charge his wife for Martinis.
  • You know you’ve mastered marriage when you shout to your husband, “Take the thing off the thing,” and he immediately knows what to do.
  • I recently saw a documentary about dinosaurs. They simply ate everyone they didn’t like. I like that concept.
  • The best way to enjoy your tea while the world is falling apart around you is to remember that the world has always been falling apart around you.
  • I’m bringing back “hold your horses” and nobody can stop me.