Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇭 has downloaded:

But that was my emotional support daylight.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has downloaded:

Don’t worry, I’m only dead inside from the waist up.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has shared:

Genies are a myth perpetuated by creepy lamps who just want to get rubbed more.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has downloaded:

I hate when people ask me what I’m doing tomorrow, I don’t even know what I’m doing today.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has downloaded:

We need a true crime show called Downtown Stabby.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has viewed:

Situationships are just you pretending you’re okay with getting used until they find someone they actually like.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has downloaded:

Plants are like “I’ll have a light lunch.”

Someone from 🇹🇬 has shared:

The sun is so successful because it has the perfect bedtime and morning routines.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

I was at a funeral yesterday and spiced things up by walking over to complete strangers and saying “Ignore what everyone else thinks. I, personally, have no issue with you being here”.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has bookmarked:

Pinterest is so therapeutic. There’s no drama, no one to argue with. Just pretty pictures.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

300 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,569

Funny Quotes Topics

17,627

Funny Quotes Images

15,569

Updated

Jan 11, 2026

Users Online

3,330

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Messenger:

I used to blame all my problems on my parents, but now that I’m a grown up, I have come to terms with the fact that when bad things happen to me, it’s probably just that Mercury’s in retrograde again.

Going viral on Threads:

Salary week, but salary weak.

Just landed via YouTube:

We need a word for a type of person who spends all their time working to live in a city so they can be near cool things, but they don’t actually like going out.

Making waves on Messenger:

I don’t mind driving in bad weather. I mind other people driving in bad weather.

Just shared via YouTube:

I remember when “disinformation” used to be called “lies.”

Spotted on Facebook:

My longest relationship has been with my Hotmail account.

Just shared via WeChat:

It’s like winter is mad and keeps storming out, then coming back yelling ‘and another thing!’

Seen just now on Discord:

You wish you had this many chins.

Trending via Snapchat:

I’ve never been to hell, but I once forgot to buy batteries for the toys on Christmas morning. The sound is still ringing in my ears.

Going viral on Instagram:

I am not living la vida loca. I am loca because of la vida.

This coffee is not coffeeing the way I need it to be coffeeing.

5 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When your coffee needs its own coffee to function ☕😴💤

beverage, caffeine, coffee, frustration, humor, i, morning, need, sarcasm

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I haven’t broken a mirror lately, but my water broke and I’ve had seven years of kids crawling into my bed.

2 months ago

bed, broke, broken, chaos, family, humor, i, kids, mirror, motherhood, parenting, sleep, water
It’s like 10,000 yawns when all you need is a nap.

2 months ago

exhaustion, fatigue, humor, nap, need, rest, sleep, yawn
My mind is like my web browser. 19 tabs are open, 3 are frozen and I have no idea where the music is coming from.

3 months ago

browser, confusion, frozen, humor, i, idea, mind, multitasking, music, open, tabs, technology, web, web browser
Accordion to current studies, 90% of you did not realize that this sentence started with a musical instrument.

2 months ago

90, accordion, awareness, humor, instrument, musical, musical instrument, realize, sentence, study, surprise, wordplay
All I want for Christmas this year is the housing market to crash, so I could buy a 5-bedroom, 4-bathroom house for $3.

3 months ago

3, bathroom, bedroom, buy, Christmas, crash, house, housing, housing market, humor, i, market, price, want, wish, year
Sorry I missed your call when I pressed decline.

2 months ago

call, communication, decline, humor, i, missed, missed call, sorry, technology

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

97 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Sometimes I sneeze so loud and hard I think I’m a dad.

44 shares on Messenger this month:

Sex is cool, but have you ever found an academic article that fits your research topic perfectly and supports all of your claims?

25 shares on YouTube this month:

Welcome to adulthood: you’re not exhausted, you’re just awake. Have a nice day.

38 shares on Slack this month:

My favorite dance move is trying to get out of my own way.

73 shares on Messenger this month:

I won’t bore you with my problems because all of my problems are fascinating.

89 shares on X this month:

Airport security asked me if I’ve seen anything unusual. I just paid $18 for a coke & a sandwich. Let’s start with that.

71 shares on Messenger this month:

Lowkey terrifying when someone attractive is actually into you, omg.

62 shares on Telegram this month:

If you pick a movie that’s longer than the flight, the pilot gets a notification to fly around for a bit.

67 shares on YouTube this month:

There’s a rhyming Italian expression for saying “take it or leave it” that goes “o mangi questa minestra o salti dalla finestra”. It means “either eat this soup or throw yourself out the window”.

60 shares on X this month:

Being alone is my favourite way of being.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇷 has shared:

My wife just pulled me into the other room, and I thought she wanted to have a serious talk, but she just wanted to give me M&M’s without the kids seeing.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has copied:

The quality of clothing at retail stores today is quite literally the quality that Halloween costumes used to be.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has shared:

Going to the beach is 99% getting ready for the beach and 1% enjoying the beach.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has copied:

Once married, the woman takes over the entire closet and the man stores everything he owns in his left cargo pocket.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has bookmarked:

Eating watermelon and minding my own business.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has viewed:

“You’re a psychopath!” At least I’m on a path, babe, sort your life out.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has bookmarked:

Do you ever restart the dryer because you don’t feel like folding the clothes yet?

Someone from 🇧🇬 has downloaded:

Imagine surviving Covid 19 and then China releases Covid 19S Plus Pro.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has shared:

I am a friend to all cats. Yes, even the mean ones. They have their reasons.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has viewed:

They should let me go inside everyones house just to see.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Instagram:

I wish more dumb people were shy.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Do y’all ever get pre-annoyed? Like, you already know someone is about to piss you off.

Making waves on Snapchat:

And to my children, I leave 127 open tabs on Safari.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Who you are when you’re stuck behind a slow driver is the real you.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Every time I see a dog with its head out a window, I know it’s having a better day than I am.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

I used to have this mental illness, where I thought putting your heart and soul into a relationship would make it work.

Just shared via X:

I want to sleep but my brain won’t stop talking to itself.

Just landed via YouTube:

Drilling for oil is well boring.

Spotted on Discord:

I’m officially at the age where I enjoy when people cancel plans.

Going viral on Threads:

Reoccurring dreams be like: ‘I dunno, here’s a rerun’

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

This coffee is not coffeeing the way I need it to be coffeeing.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I haven’t broken a mirror lately, but my water broke and I’ve had seven years of kids crawling into my bed.

It’s like 10,000 yawns when all you need is a nap.

My mind is like my web browser. 19 tabs are open, 3 are frozen and I have no idea where the music is coming from.

Accordion to current studies, 90% of you did not realize that this sentence started with a musical instrument.

All I want for Christmas this year is the housing market to crash, so I could buy a 5-bedroom, 4-bathroom house for $3.

Sorry I missed your call when I pressed decline.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨