Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇴 has downloaded:

If three ghosts visited me on Christmas, I’d make them play Mario Party with me.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has downloaded:

A penguin is a bird the way a hot dog is a sandwich.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has shared:

The difference between a songbird and a hummingbird is that one of them knows the lyrics.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has copied:

Sometimes, after I’ve completed a task that wasn’t on my to-do list, I’ll add it and then cross it off for the free dopamine boost.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has viewed:

Wolves are just dogs that nobody has called a “good boy” yet.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has downloaded:

Why can’t my career pursue me instead?

Someone from 🇱🇦 has copied:

Imagine how bored the person who invented mayonnaise must have been.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has viewed:

Did it hurt when you forgot your headphones and couldn’t romanticize your walk home?

Someone from 🇮🇳 has shared:

Democracy is a fine thing. The bad thing is that the stupid people are allowed to take part.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has viewed:

They need to invent a job for people who aren’t good at anything nor motivated nor social.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Jan 2, 2026

3,717

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Instagram:

I’m awake and working. Please respect my privacy during these trying and emotional times.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Dear everyone. Upset, bored, angry or hungry. I’m here for you. Sincerely, fridge.

Just shared via Twitch:

I get shy when my man stares at me for too long because what if he’s realizing I’m actually a lil ugly.

Making waves on Discord:

Thrifting must be so awesome for big guys and extremely small women.

Going viral on Reddit:

If it weren’t for this whole job thingy that pays me money, I’d become a professional nap taker.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

My superpower is giving you the middle finger using my eyes only.

Spotted on Discord:

The point of life is going to a good restaurant and getting two cocktails with dinner. That’s it.

Trending via LinkedIn:

Men used to build castles for women they love, but now they think replying on time is too much effort.

Spreading quickly via X:

May the hardest part of your day be getting the jeans over your butt.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Some people buy shoes to feel alive. I buy boarding passes.

What do people do with all the extra time they save by writing ‘k’ instead of ‘ok’?

2 months ago

0

What do people do with all the extra time they save by writing ‘k’ instead of ‘ok’?

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Seriously! 🤔 Do they use it to meticulously arrange their sock drawers, contemplate the mysteries of the universe, or perhaps master the art of the perfect cup of tea? ☕️ The possibilities are endless when you're living life in the fast lane of 'k'! 😄 #TimeSavers"

communication, efficiency, humor, k, language, ok, people, slang, texting, time, writing

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Grammar is the difference between knowing your shit and knowing you’re shit.

0

2 months ago

difference, education, grammar, humor, joke, knowing, language, shit, wordplay, writing
Live, laugh, lie to the doctor about how many drinks you have per week.

0

2 months ago

doctor, drinks, health, honesty, humor, laugh, lie, live, partying, week
Imagine if all the money spent on AI was spent on trains.

0

1 month ago

AI, imagination, imagine, money, spending, spent, technology, train, transportation
Why are poets thinking that they are the ones tortured and not those who read their poetry?

0

2 months ago

humor, irony, poet, poetry, read, reading, thinking, torture
The question “how is work” really pisses me off. Work is work, bro, I don’t know what else you want me to say.

0

2 months ago

annoyance, bro, daily, daily grind, else, expectations, frustration, grind, humor, i, know, me, question, response, say, want, work, workplace
I don’t trust anyone who gets enraged over messed-up fast food orders.

0

2 months ago

anger, anyone, fast, fast food, food, food order, frustration, humor, i, order, over, personality, reaction, trust

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

34 shares on Messenger this month:

Still don’t understand how girls with no jobs be holding iPhones.

82 shares on Messenger this month:

They get real weird at the gun store if you walk in crying and asking for “the biggest one”.

68 shares on YouTube this month:

I don’t flirt, I just say weird things and hope something sticks.

65 shares on Instagram this month:

My optimism doesn’t come out of thin air. A flask is involved.

58 shares on Facebook this month:

A police lineup, but you have to recognize your dad’s sneeze.

21 shares on WeChat this month:

I wish rage burned calories. I would be so skinny.

66 shares on Messenger this month:

My favorite 90s skill: Uninstalling my car stereo and hiding it in my glove box in under 15 seconds.

81 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Me at a nightclub: Where are the chairs?

54 shares on Pinterest this month:

Can’t believe my neighbor rang my doorbell at 3 a.m. last night… Luckily, I was still up playing the drums.

58 shares on X this month:

No, thanks—social drama. Puberty sucked enough the first time around.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Microplastics are a waste of time. I go straight to eating whole packaging.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

This whole working for a living thing goes on for how long?

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I need a job with a salary that’ll shock me every month.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

If you’re happy and you know it, keep it to yourself. No one likes a braggart.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

“I’m doing better than my parents at my age. They had, like, no followers.”

24 folks are currently checking 👀

They should invent more hobbies for people without skills or patience.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m almost finished reading your tweet. Love it so far.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

One thing nobody gives pigeons enough credit for is their ability to get out of the way on the sidewalk. A lot of you could learn a thing or two from them.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Just so you know, what you now call an energy bar is what my father gave the canary.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Dads were right. Walking around with your hands behind your back and looking at everything around with a mild look of disgust and annoyance is so much fun.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,700

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

No revenge, because to know me only as a memory is to suffer.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has shared:

Your childhood wasn’t complete unless you were chased by a dog… or a goat… or even worse, a chicken.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

Elsa froze her entire kingdom instead of dealing with her feelings. I respect that level of avoidance.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has copied:

Life is just a sequence of missed opportunities.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has copied:

Maybe one day a street will be named after me. Or a school. Or a mental hospital.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

And for my next trick, I will appear to know what I’m doing.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has bookmarked:

Sometimes I do this fun little thing, where I take the time to write a grocery list, and then I forget it at home.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has viewed:

I’m glad nobody can see the face I make when I’ve just started the washing machine and then spot a sock on the floor.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

Womansplaining is when a woman tries to explain to you what you’re thinking/feeling, and is just totally 100% wrong.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has downloaded:

The human body is amazing. One half-open eye and the brain under emergency power are enough to make coffee.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Facebook:

Maybe dogs are smarter than us because they found a way to get fed and housed without having to go to college and get a job.

Trending via Pinterest:

Have kids so you can live in a house full of people who can’t find anything.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.

Just landed via Discord:

I think Cinderella should have lived a happy life with all her animal friends rather than settle for a man who had her try on a shoe because he didn’t recognize her without makeup.

Just landed via Pinterest:

When you ask for your phone charger back and your teenager has the audacity to ask “what percentage are you on?”

Trending via Threads:

I hope this email kills us both.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

The thing I hate most about my stationary bike is having to pick it up and turn it around for the return trip.

Seen just now on Reddit:

My mom gave me a coffee mug that says “Be your own kind of beautiful” and I’m really trying not to read too much into that.

Breaking via Facebook:

Can’t. Too busy saving daylight.

Live now on X:

My real introduction to classical music came from watching Tom & Jerry cartoons as a kid. Also how I got into sadism.

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