Trendy Funny Quotes

  • When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye.
  • If biscuits were slimming and contained every nutrient the human body needs, I’d be in terrific shape.
  • If you can’t handle me while I’m broke, then you don’t deserve me when I have $600.
  • I’m not super into getting older but I do like how nobody asks me to help them move anymore.
  • Hey, we’re calling off the search party. We found a different guy out there we like more.
  • I always mean what I say, I don’t always mean to say it out loud, but I always mean it.