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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇼 has downloaded:

I met a microbiologist today. He was a lot bigger than I expected.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has shared:

Dudes get a MacBook, and all of a sudden, they got work to do in public places.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has bookmarked:

This pillow isn’t going to scream into itself.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has copied:

I’m saving money on rent by moving into an abandoned cobweb.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has shared:

It’s not even a crush. it’s just unsupervised hope.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

I’m not even a 2nd choice, I’m like an 8th choice, sometimes a 10th.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has bookmarked:

Social anxiety so bad I wonder if I’m welcome at places I was invited to.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has bookmarked:

One pretty important part of being a dad is walking faster than the rest of your family through an airport.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

“My family doesn’t have a black sheep,” I say, while everyone avoids eye contact.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has bookmarked:

Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I wanted to skirt the issue.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,743

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Can we change the phrase “Can I be frank with you” to “Can I be william with you”? I don’t want to be Frank.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I don’t need the audio tour at the museum, I have my teen to provide critical commentary the entire time.

Going viral on Snapchat:

They say we learn from our mistakes. That’s why I’m making as many as possible… I’ll be a genius soon.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

My life is ruined. I wish to live no more. Never mind, I found the remote.

Just shared via Twitch:

Don’t ask me why, but the older you get, the more you love coffee.

Spotted on Messenger:

Animals be 15 minutes old and already know what to do.

Just shared via Threads:

I’m that person who will restart a song because I got distracted and wasn’t appreciating it enough.

Going viral on YouTube:

The best addition to any essay is, of course, a condescending tone.

Live now on Reddit:

You are what you eat! (If anyone needed more encouragement to eat the rich.)

Going viral on TikTok:

I would like even faster food.

Yes, my sex drive is higher than my will to live, and what about it?

6 days ago

Humorous text about high sex drive and low will to live, playful and cheeky vibe.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Ah, the eternal struggle between desire and existential dread! 🙈🔥 Who needs a will to live when you've got a drive that refuses to quit? 😂💃 Embrace the chaos and zest for life in your own special way! 🎉🔥 #LivingLaVidaLoca"

desire, drive, existential, humor, joke, life, live, relationship, sex, sex drive, will to live, yes

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

89 shares on Discord this month:

The guy who drills the holes so you can assemble IKEA furniture is clearly having problems at home.

75 shares on TikTok this month:

People who pee in the shower, have you thought about peeing before you get in the shower?

76 shares on Facebook this month:

A friend of mine decided to cut all the toxic people out of his life, or so I was informed.

71 shares on Twitch this month:

Nobody gives me butterflies anymore. Y’all just give me brain damage.

24 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Shoutout to myself for ruining my own life.

67 shares on Reddit this month:

You can tell a lot about someone based on which Spice Girl they were most attracted to.

84 shares on Discord this month:

Shazam but for random noises outside.

13 shares on X this month:

A genie that does my bidding would fix me.

87 shares on Slack this month:

They’re making me get out of bed.

90 shares on Snapchat this month:

Sometimes I think about Adam and Eve and how they couldn’t even get a babysitter.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I hope you all get laid soon, for your own mental health.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s not the destination that matters. It’s the snacks you eat on the way.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I suffer from that syndrome where your neutral expression makes it look like you’re an angry serial killer.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

So glad that the dream I had of you isn’t affecting me at all, and I’m able to go on with my day without thinking of it.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Told my homie I was “going through it” and he just said “go around it”.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I get you, bowel syndrome. I’m irritable, too.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

A woman’s way of flirting is thinking about you until you get the urge to reach out to her.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

A song that hits so hard it makes you want a cigarette.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

The Sims fulfills the millennial fantasy of being able to afford a house in a walkable neighborhood on the salary of a professional carrot peeler.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Sometimes when I’m having a particularly stressful day, I take a pregnancy test to remind myself that at least one thing in my life is still going as planned.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,750

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇼 has viewed:

Nothing messes up your Friday like realizing it’s only Thursday.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

Dating apps are no place for meeting your soulmate. The best way to find your soulmate is to tweet really good.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has viewed:

I’ve been a main character since birth.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has bookmarked:

Whoever came up with a 30 minute lunch break needs a 30 minute beating.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has shared:

The worst thing I’ve seen as a paramedic is my paycheck.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has downloaded:

It’s officially Christmas shopping season, and I can’t even afford my own life.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has downloaded:

I stopped adding “Let me know if you have any more questions!” to my emails because don’t email me again.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has viewed:

Is my life this bad because I didn’t forward that email to 15 people back in 2007?

Someone from 🇲🇼 has bookmarked:

If food delivery apps had never been invented, I would either be wildly rich or dead.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

Yeah, sex is cool, but have you ever crawled out of the worst depression of your life and got your spark back?

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Her heart is an abandoned garden filled with ghosts and dying flowers.

Just shared via Telegram:

Interviewer: “What did you learn from your previous job?” Me: “That I need a new job.”

Breaking via Facebook:

When a man likes you, he talks to you every day, and apparently, when you start to like him back, he is very busy and can’t talk at all. That’s how it works.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Nothing humbles me faster than my phone camera accidentally turning on.

Spotted on Facebook:

I hope your spoon slides into your soup.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

I’m glad I have boobs. The last thing I need is people making eye contact with me.

Live now on Telegram:

Imagine hating me, and I’m just over here making love.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

Incorrectly is the only word that, when spelled correctly, is still spelled incorrectly.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Everybody hates me for being a beautiful angel with a perfect soul.

Going viral on Facebook:

Where do I see myself in 5 years? I don’t even know where I am right now.

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