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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇱 has copied:

Buying new glasses this week, so a whole bunch of you are about to get a whole lot uglier.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

This weekend was so busy, I hardly had time to sit around in my pajamas and doom scroll.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has bookmarked:

The secret to being a private person is to overshare dumb shit so people think you are an open book but then not tell them any of the important details of your life.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has viewed:

Googling symptoms until you cry.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has copied:

Now that I have a standing desk, I’m adding manual labor to my resume.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has copied:

The year I was born, getting a little far on that little scrolly thing.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has shared:

The porn bots liking my posts from years ago is just reminding me that I’ve always been hilarious.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

330 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,923

Funny Quotes Topics

17,095

Funny Quotes Images

14,923

Updated

Dec 12, 2025

Users Online

3,575

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Messenger:

Two people had sex and now I’m fighting for my life everyday.

Freshly posted on Threads:

I received my electricity bill. I think they billed me for sunlight, divine light, and the light at the end of the tunnel.

Freshly posted on Threads:

The biggest problem with working from home? I want to go home even though I’m already at home.

Spotted on WeChat:

I put the dance in “Good riddance!”

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

Is it just me, or were we promised a totally different frog-to-prince ratio?

Just landed via Telegram:

I want to save money, but all I’m saving are memes.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Don’t go chasing waterfalls? The place where many video games hide easter eggs and other rare items?

You’re not lazy, you’re just buffering in HD.

1 month ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Just waiting for my brain to download new energy… please stand by! 🧠🔄😴"

buffering, HD, humor, joke, just, lazy, procrastination, tech

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

You’re never alone. There’s mold.

1 month ago
alone, companionship, humor, loneliness, mold, never
Why am I scrolling? What am I searching for?

3 months ago
am, boredom, distraction, habit, i, media, question, scrolling, searching, self-reflection, social, social media, why
Normalize saying, “I’m not informed enough to have an opinion on the matter.”

1 month ago
awareness, communication, enough, honesty, humility, informed, matter, mindset, norm, normalize, opinion, saying, social, social norm, truth
I respectfully ignore DMs because I promise you, I am not your soulmate.

4 months ago
am, communication, DM, DMs, humor, i, ignore, media, message, online, online communication, promise, rejection, social, social media, soulmate
Microwaves have zero chill. We get it, time is up. Calm down.

3 months ago
calm, chill, humor, impatience, microwave, time, zero
I accidentally used my dog’s shampoo today, and now I’m feeling like such a good girl.

1 month ago
accidentally, dog, dogs, feeling, girl, good, grooming, humor, i, lighthearted, pet, playful, self-deprecating, shampoo, today, used

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇷 has bookmarked:

Slipping into something more comfortable, another dimension.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has bookmarked:

If you really think about it, extraordinary isn’t that great. It’s just an extra helping of ordinary.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has viewed:

Happy birthday to everyone, for the rest of your lives. I can’t do this anymore.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has shared:

I wonder what John Connor thinks now that everyone is embracing AI.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has shared:

Living up to your potential sounds exhausting.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

Don’t believe in yourself, you can’t do it.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has copied:

Why waste words or gestures when a raised eyebrow is enough to make a statement?

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Messenger:

Maturity is when you realize money can actually buy happiness.

Going viral on Facebook:

Most meetings end with the conclusion that everything needs to be discussed in another meeting.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Phew, I thought the weather was broken because there was this weird yellow thing in the sky. But all’s well, it’s raining again.

Breaking via Twitch:

Whoever named the grapefruit when there was already a fruit named grape. Incompetent legend. I wish we could hang out.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Your favorite little ball of silliness has logged in.

Breaking via Instagram:

Selling porn is gross, but selling food and small household items is grocer.

Going viral on Instagram:

Very disappointed to find out that the universal remote control I bought does not control the universe.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

You’re not lazy, you’re just buffering in HD.

You’re never alone. There’s mold.

Microwaves have zero chill. We get it, time is up. Calm down.

I accidentally used my dog’s shampoo today, and now I’m feeling like such a good girl.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Psych meds aren’t enough anymore. Hit me with a shovel.

Having a job ruined my life.

Shoutout to my kids because they aren’t listening!

They call it a coffin because they’re finally coughing up that inheritance.

Love is like a bird. Sometimes flying around me but then moving on.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Going to ragebait men by asking, “Do you ever wish you were tall?”

Dear Apple, at no point will I ever text someone “he’ll yeah” ..

If you want people to have kind words when you pass, you should say kind words when you’re alive.

I love how unforgiving soy sauce is. Cause you know immediately when you did too much with her.

The most dangerous part of your 50s is those first few steps after prolonged sitting.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Zoom is really only for one thing: realizing our dream of staring at ourselves while talking to other people.

At Christmas time, all outstanding invoices are always transferred with the reference “Hohoho”.

The worst thing I’ve seen as a paramedic is my paycheck.

There’s nothing better than knowing that you don’t have to set an alarm clock for the next day.

The worst thing you can do when you notice your kids are playing nicely together is telling them that they’re playing nicely together.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

It’s fun getting room service. I just love eating a $19 hamburger at a desk in front of a mirror.

Your twenties are for destroying and betraying yourself for nothing.

Unlike the brain, the stomach alerts you when it’s empty.

If I don’t reply, assume I opened your message, nodded, and then got distracted.

No camera can do justice to a landscape that melts your heart.

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You’re not lazy, you’re just buffering in HD.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

You’re never alone. There’s mold.

Why am I scrolling? What am I searching for?

Normalize saying, “I’m not informed enough to have an opinion on the matter.”

I respectfully ignore DMs because I promise you, I am not your soulmate.

Microwaves have zero chill. We get it, time is up. Calm down.

I accidentally used my dog’s shampoo today, and now I’m feeling like such a good girl.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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