Trending Funny Quotes šŸ‘‡

  • A fun wedding bit is to sit next to a random guest, point to the bride or groom & whisper, ā€œit should’ve been youā€
  • It’s strange that watching paint dry is considered boring but going to an art gallery is considered interesting. That’s just watching paint that’s already dry.
  • I’m best man at my buddy’s second wedding. Is it appropriate to open my dinner speech with ā€œWelcome back everyoneā€?
  • “You look tired.” Yes, bro, I stayed up all night obsessing over things I have no control over.
  • I am not old. I am in the prime of my decay.
  • I’m sick of getting woken up at 6am by the bin men. I just want a nice sleep but they always insist that I get out of the bin before they collect it.