Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Everyone hates on the dentist but at least they don’t try to weigh you.
  • I have a photographic memory, but I’ve run out of film.
  • Some of us better hope Santa doesn’t check social media, because if he does, all we’re getting for Christmas is therapy.
  • If i say “morning!” to you, it does not mean “good morning”, I am merely exclaiming in horror that it is morning.
  • Sometimes I tell myself I should stop drinking so much, but I’m not about to listen to a drunk who’s talking to himself.
  • My life is simple, I see a queue of more than 6 people, I go home.