Trending Funny Quotes πŸ‘‡

  • I taped a picture of my paycheck on my front door to keep all the solicitors away.
  • Spent most of the day making sure the couch still works. So far so good.
  • With no training whatsoever, I took out myself and the other two people exiting the ski lift in one fell swoop.
  • Exercise won’t cure your depression, but it can make you hotter than your enemies.
  • I’ve never been kissed under the cameltoe or whatever it’s called.
  • Giving all the dogs in my neighborhood matching sweaters for Christmas so they can be in a gang.