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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇴 has shared:

If you have ever spent an hour on Twitter then you understand why there’s such an urgency to create Artificial Intelligence.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has copied:

Confession: If you’ve ever been in a revolving door with me, I was only pretending to push.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

My therapist is fluffy and walks on four paws.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

Getting a key tattoo, but getting it covered up with a doormat tattoo, so no one ever finds it.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has viewed:

I would be more patient if it didn’t take so long.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has bookmarked:

At the dispensary asking which strain will stop the yearning.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has copied:

I am a person who wants to do a lot of things trapped in the body of a person who wants to sleep a lot.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

I’m always best at the things I shouldn’t do.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has viewed:

The horror: “Come on, I’ll introduce you to everyone.”

Someone from 🇲🇾 has viewed:

Never trust someone who can eat 24/7 but is still skinny.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

831 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,993

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,993

4 hours ago

3,448

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Discord:

Never vacuuming so I don’t disrupt my carpet’s natural micro biome.

Live now on Snapchat:

I would like even faster food.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

My teen is asking for noise-cancelling headphones like I’m going to give him the gift of ignoring me better.

Seen just now on Reddit:

The internet is fun because you can post about mayonnaise and somehow end up in a fight.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

I may not know what’s going on, but I also have no idea what’s happening.

Spotted on TikTok:

In banana years, I am bread.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

This quote is invisible. Only people who masturbate a lot can read it.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Wow, this is a really nice, sturdy box. I should keep it in the attic for the next 20 years.

Breaking via Facebook:

I hope I find $10,000 on the floor later.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Hell hath no fury like a toddler who lost the chance to push a button.

Car naps hit different, especially when you are the one driving.

6 months ago

Car naps hit different, especially when you are the one driving.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic paradox of a car nap – simultaneously rejuvenating and risky! 😴🚗 It's like a power nap with an element of danger thrown in for good measure. Just imagine waking up with a jolt and realizing you've been driving on autopilot… literally! Drive safe, nap safe, folks! 😅"

automotive, car, car nap, driving, hit, humor, multitasking, nap, relaxation, sleep

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

831 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,993

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,993

4 hours ago

3,434

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇷 has downloaded:

I don’t need a fancy watch to tell me I’m not fit one bit.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has viewed:

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I hate the sounds you make when you chew.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has shared:

In my defense, Your Honor, I grossly misunderstood the meaning of Boxing Day.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has downloaded:

I don’t usually think about what I say before I say it. I prefer to think about it after I’ve said it, late at night, for the rest of my life.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has bookmarked:

I hope the babies I was born with at the hospital are doing good.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has copied:

I voted for the candidate on the last yard sign I saw before pulling in. Slow children at play will lead us into the future.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

I always preferred the English spelling of “diarrhea” which is “diarrhoea” because it really looks like you’ve lost control of your vowels.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has bookmarked:

I hate it when I’m cleaning the house and suddenly find a bowl of ice cream in my lap and my soap opera on.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

Today’s the day I’m gonna’ make the onions cry.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has viewed:

Fake laughing with customers is actually a job skill.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Facebook:

We all have that person who insists on using a blanket on the couch, no matter the weather.

Shared recently on Slack:

My last straw is way longer than I thought.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

I hope none of the people I vowed to “help hide a body” ever actually need my help.

Spotted on Messenger:

I’m going to be real pissed if I get my shit together and the world ends.

Trending via Facebook:

Don’t forget to make everything about you today.

Making waves on Facebook:

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

Trending via Discord:

Dear Stomach, you’re bored, not hungry. So shut up.

Spotted on X:

I’ve decided to become an organ donor. When I die, I want an elephant to get a new trunk.

Going viral on Threads:

I don’t know why we traded horses for cars. Your car won’t stop in front of a river and be like, “no way dumbass, we aren’t going to make that.”

Going viral on Discord:

It’s so crazy how people are never down to just go get a burger. It didn’t used to be like this.

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