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Someone from 🇷🇼 has viewed:

Just blocked all the ugly people, so if you see this… what’s up, big sexy?

Someone from 🇩🇯 has viewed:

Someone is probably in the worst argument of their life right now. LOL!

Someone from 🇺🇦 has viewed:

I’m not asking for a lot, I just want someone down to earth that’s gonna touch me all over like my shower curtain does.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

Airports are so funny. Like, “Oh, you’re flying across the country? Would you like to hang out in a mall first?”

Someone from 🇧🇿 has bookmarked:

People shouldn’t be at the grocery store the same time as me. Get out of the way.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has viewed:

“Are you getting your period?” God forbid I’m just evil.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has downloaded:

I have a lot to offer! Most of it’s bad, but it’s still a lot.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has shared:

True bravery is getting a text from a woman with three questions in it, and only responding to one.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has copied:

That “never again” talk with yourself after a certain experience is always funny.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has shared:

Future generations will never have to live in unprecedented times, because we’re precedenting the Hell out of everything right now.

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,758

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Sometimes I feel useless, but then I remember I breathe out carbon dioxide for plants.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Every laptop should have a “cat” button that disables the keyboard so they can nap.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Since I tolerate gluten and lactose well, I can afford a few intolerances in the interpersonal area.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Have to write a note to my kid’s first grade teacher, and now I’m stressed out about my handwriting.

Live now on Snapchat:

Come on, karma, do your job.

Shared recently on Threads:

I can resist everything except temptation.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Can you imagine how hot I’d be if I ate right and took care of my body? I’m not gonna do it, but can you imagine?

Going viral on Twitch:

How am I supposed to make life choices when I still use my fingers to count and sing the whole alphabet to see what letter comes next.

Shared recently on X:

If you sweat while you eat, it should count as a workout.

Going viral on Instagram:

Sitting in an antique chair is weird, like this thing has seen so many butts.

Checking a selfie only to find there’s a demon in the reflection behind you, and it looks significantly healthier than you.

3 weeks ago

Funny Quotes

Humorous text about discovering a surprisingly healthy demon reflection behind a selfie.

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Commentary:
When even the demon in your selfie has a better skincare routine 🧖‍♂️😂📸

behind, checking, demon, funny observation, healthy, humor, looks, observation, only, reflection, scary, selfie, surprise

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61 shares on YouTube this month:

The audacity of someone being in the store aisle I want to go down.

16 shares on Twitch this month:

Don’t forget to have an orgasm today. Partner is optional. Pleasure is not.

44 shares on Reddit this month:

Book reviews be like: “5 stars. I’m sobbing. I’m unwell. I haven’t eaten in 16 hours. Highly recommend.”

60 shares on Reddit this month:

I think my dog always follows me to the bathroom because I always follow him outside and he thinks that’s the way it works.

63 shares on WeChat this month:

You ever killed your own vibe by remembering?

63 shares on YouTube this month:

Every room is a panic room if someone farts.

79 shares on Discord this month:

Do cats have a sense of causation between grooming themselves and coughing up hairballs, or do they think it’s just an annoying separate thing which just happens to them sometimes?

58 shares on Facebook this month:

Accidentally said “normal” when they asked what milk I wanted at the leftist cafe.

76 shares on Threads this month:

My nephew asks so many questions that Alexa just told him it’s okay to bathe with the toaster.

70 shares on Discord this month:

Note to self: No more bitching about ugly furniture with people at IKEA whose home you haven’t been to yet.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇿 has shared:

My hobby is misidentifying dinosaurs so my daughter can correct me.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has viewed:

Me going to work because I’m too honest to scam people, too shy to be an influencer, too good for a sugar daddy, and too dumb for crypto.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has viewed:

Cancelling a date so I can order pizza and go to bed at 8:30 p.m.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has viewed:

Relationship goal: synchronizing our eye rolls.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has downloaded:

Gotta find someone you’re thermostatically compatible with. You can’t be a 74 dating a 62.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has bookmarked:

People ask you, “are you crazy”, and then get scared when you answer, “yes”.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has bookmarked:

The date abruptly ended over a disagreement on how to pronounce Gnocchi.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has shared:

If you’re wondering how motherhood is going, I’m watching a TV show and someone is in traction with a full body cast and I sighed and said “That looks so relaxing”

Someone from 🇲🇪 has downloaded:

I can’t date until the curse is lifted.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has downloaded:

Can’t, holding a grudge.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Snapchat:

I tell my kids winning isn’t everything and then I steal money from the monopoly bank.

Trending via Snapchat:

Big fan of taking a huge bite and then nodding while I chew. You make an excellent point, food.

Seen just now on Facebook:

Just so you know, it’s almost impossible to drink coffee while laying down.

Just landed via Pinterest:

My husband loves it when he orders fries, I say I don’t want any, and then I swoop in on his like a seagull at the beach.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Never trust a man that’s good at flirting. He’s had too much practice.

Making waves on X:

“Your password is too weak.” Just wait until you see my will to live.

Just landed via Messenger:

Can’t, I’m pulling it together.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

“I’m like Sisyphus but with dishes. Dishyphus.”

Just landed via Pinterest:

I’m multitasking: I can listen, ignore and forget at the same time.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Procrastination isn’t a horrible thing. I mean, you always have something to do tomorrow… plus you have nothing to do today.

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Activity Log ✨

Checking a selfie only to find there’s a demon in the reflection behind you, and it looks significantly healthier than you.

There’s no filter on my pics or my thoughts. I’m just out here raw-dogging it.

I feel like you’re allowed to start your day at 4 p.m. if you are pure of heart.

My morning yoga routine has really helped shift my lower back pain into my upper back.

Why do birds love going apeshit first thing in the morning?

Phew, I thought the weather was broken because there was this weird yellow thing in the sky. But all’s well, it’s raining again.

Guys with grey in their beards will do that thing you like.

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Checking a selfie only to find there’s a demon in the reflection behind you, and it looks significantly healthier than you.

Keep the laugh going 😂

There’s no filter on my pics or my thoughts. I’m just out here raw-dogging it.

I feel like you’re allowed to start your day at 4 p.m. if you are pure of heart.

My morning yoga routine has really helped shift my lower back pain into my upper back.

Why do birds love going apeshit first thing in the morning?

Phew, I thought the weather was broken because there was this weird yellow thing in the sky. But all’s well, it’s raining again.

Guys with grey in their beards will do that thing you like.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨