Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇭 has downloaded:

The sheer audacity of life to ask anything of me today.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has downloaded:

Sex in the snow is wintercourse.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has shared:

Game night with the family is only fun until I lose.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has bookmarked:

It’s not a Sunday unless you completely waste it and then feel sad around 8 p.m.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has viewed:

I finally figured out my lifelong dream of becoming a human blanket, but my friends still call it napping on their couch.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has shared:

It sucks when you realize it’s only Thursday, until you realize it’s only Wednesday.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has bookmarked:

Sorry I’m late. It’s just because of who I am as a person.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

I miss when men had big hair, louder feelings, and leaned over cars to declare their love.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

Realizing this yogurt I’m eating is more active and cultured than I am.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has bookmarked:

I need to stop drinking so much. Did I say drinking? I meant thinking. I definitely need to drink more.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

55 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,324

Funny Quotes Topics

17,443

Funny Quotes Images

15,324

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,508

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Discord:

Being the introverted hopeless romantic with a high sex drive is a curse.

Trending via Snapchat:

When the exam is so hard that you look out the window to appreciate nature.

Shared recently on YouTube:

The number of times I stand in a room, staring because I forgot why I walked in there, is embarrassingly high.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

My kid’s superpower is knowing he won’t like a food before he even tries it.

Going viral on YouTube:

No one comes off looking worse than the third party who was asked to interfere in a couple fight.

Seen just now on Threads:

People who often talk to themselves are more intelligent than others. At least that’s what I tell myself.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

Anytime someone throws a Great Gatsby themed party, I have to assume they never finished the book.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

I could never abuse substances, they mean a lot to me.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

What base is it when he says, “I know you need it badly,” but he’s talking about sleep?

Dear 8 hours of sleep, I miss you so much.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Oh, 8 hours of sleep, where art thou? Come back to me and let us dream sweet dreams together! 😴💭 #SleepDeprivedStruggles"

exhaustion, humor, i, longing, miss, relationship, rest, sleep, time

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Commenting “AI slop” on a high school acquaintance’s Instagram post of their newborn baby.

0

1 month ago

acquaintance, AI, awkward, awkward interaction, baby, comment, high, high school, humor, Instagram, interaction, media, newborn, post, school, social, social media
Pretending you don’t notice people staring at you is a skill.

0

2 months ago

awkwardness, humor, notice, people, pretending, skill, social, staring
My husband accidentally locked himself out of the house, and I didn’t hear him knocking until I finished eating the rest of his cheesecake. So weird.

0

2 months ago

accident, accidentally, cheesecake, dessert, eating, finished, funny situation, hear, house, humor, husband, i, knocking, locked, locked out, marriage, marriage humor, rest, situation, weird
You’re either snacking with me or snacking against me.

0

2 months ago

competition, friendship, fun, humor, me, snack, snacking, togetherness
It’s like ten thousand spoons when all you need is a Like.

0

2 months ago

absurdity, expectation, frustration, humor, irony, Like, need, spoon, spoons, ten
All we needed to be happy in the 90s was music and cigarettes.

0

3 months ago

90s, cigarette, cigarettes, happiness, happy, music, nostalgia

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

75 shares on WhatsApp this month:

There are people who leave comments on porn videos.

79 shares on Facebook this month:

Rare earth, this rare earth, that. There’s nothing more rare on this earth than affordable housing in a walkable neighborhood.

78 shares on YouTube this month:

“Follow your heart,” as advice, is sort of like “abandon yourself to cognitive bias.”

90 shares on Discord this month:

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, but the very next day, Guantanamo Bay.

46 shares on WeChat this month:

Aside from cocaine, has anyone figured out what that little pocket on your jeans is for?

14 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I don’t have a favorite vampire. If you ask me, they all suck.

75 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’ve been blocked by better.

99 shares on Reddit this month:

I have poor night vision so I upgraded to LED headlights because it’s important to me to ensure nobody else can see either.

53 shares on WeChat this month:

That awkward moment, when all eyes are on the bride, but your son is the groom.

15 shares on WhatsApp this month:

It sucks that the reward for being responsible, is just a bunch of new responsibilities.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇪 has viewed:

I have now learned the moonwalk. It’s visually the coolest way to get fresh dog poop off the soles of your shoes.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has copied:

I think my dad just eradicated a small village with his sneeze.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

Startup idea: Instagram, but it only shows you posts from people you follow, and they’re in chronological order.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has shared:

That’s me in the corner eating Nutella with a spoon.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has downloaded:

I get it, sauce, I also thicken over time.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

So proud of my ancestors for crawling out of the sea and evolving lungs. Pretty disappointed in them ever since though.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has downloaded:

Biblical loophole: It’s not premarital sex if you never intend to get married.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has copied:

I would prefer not to.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

Oh, you like NYC? Name every rat.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has shared:

Why trust atoms? Because they’ve never been caught fibbing, just fission.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Cancel culture has been canceled.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

Come on, brain, release the happy chemicals.

Trending via TikTok:

Welcome to your 40s. Your bra wins the Oscar for the best actor in a supportive role.

Spotted on Discord:

I have been alive all my life, and have not once seen a Chinese food commercial.

Just landed via X:

Your card declining when you know you have money is a very funny experience.

Going bananas on Slack:

Washing mushrooms is the quickest way to figure out exactly how much dirt you’re okay with eating.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Grocery carts should have barcode scanners on them so you can see how much you’re spending as you put things in your cart.

Going viral on Snapchat:

I put the “pro” in procrastinate.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Them: Good morning! Me: Where?

Trending via Messenger:

Behind every beautiful woman is either tummy issues, low iron, or poor eyesight.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Dear 8 hours of sleep, I miss you so much.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Commenting “AI slop” on a high school acquaintance’s Instagram post of their newborn baby.

Pretending you don’t notice people staring at you is a skill.

My husband accidentally locked himself out of the house, and I didn’t hear him knocking until I finished eating the rest of his cheesecake. So weird.

You’re either snacking with me or snacking against me.

It’s like ten thousand spoons when all you need is a Like.

All we needed to be happy in the 90s was music and cigarettes.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨