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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇧🇷 has bookmarked:

No, I wasn’t dancing. I got harassed by a bumble bee.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

Accidentally clicked a post about UFOs, and now my Facebook algorithm thinks I’m a much different person.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

A recent study showed that people who are reading this text thought they were learning something useful.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has copied:

Being silly is very important for my mental health.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has downloaded:

I never though I’d be the kind of person who wakes up early to exercise. I was right.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has downloaded:

If we hadn’t made them extinct, instead of Kung Fu Panda we could have had Tae Kwon Dodo.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has viewed:

Just so you know, what you now call an energy bar is what my father gave the canary.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

I’m like … if parking too far away from the curb was a person.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

The gap in my resume? Yeah, it’s called playing outside.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

I am cassette tape years old.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2326 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,488

Funny Quotes Topics

15,192

Funny Quotes Images

12,488

Updated

15 minutes ago

Users Online

3,451

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Discord:

This whole week could have been an email.

Seen just now on Reddit:

“My reading glasses would look good on your nightstand.” -Me, flirting.

Seen just now on Twitch:

“I’d rather hurl myself into an active volcano!” -me, politely declining dates.

Live now on Telegram:

About to form my very first opinion.

Just shared via Slack:

My bank account and I are no longer on speaking terms.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

You can be anything. Be the person who ends meetings early.

Trending via Discord:

When I said I wanted to be held, I didn’t mean accountable.

Spotted on Facebook:

There should be a true crime story about feeding someone a peanut butter sandwich and giving them nothing to drink.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Mike is short for Micycle.

Reported on Messenger:

It may look like I’m doing nothing, but in my head I’m quite busy.

Home » Funny Irony Quotes » Page 4

1519 Funny irony quotes

More funny irony quotes 👇

1 week ago
Share →: Welcome to Elephant in the Room club, no one talks about it.

Commentary:
Does membership include free peanuts? 🐘🤐🥜
1 week ago
Share →: Sometimes I can’t believe people have had the honor of experiencing my love and chose to hurt me instead.

Commentary:
Who knew my love came with a warranty and they still didn't read the fine print? 🤦‍♀️💔😂
1 week ago
Share →: Free will: where you get to choose your own adventure … and regret it.

Commentary:
Ah, yes, nothing like choosing your own adventure just to discover you've picked the scenic route to Regretville! 😅🗺️🤦‍♂️
1 week ago
Share →: God, I wish I had enough money to discover it doesn’t make me happy.

Commentary:
Why stop at money? I need funds for a full-on happiness research grant! 😂💸🤔
1 week ago
Share →: The haters said I couldn’t do it. And they were correct. Honestly, great call from the haters.

Commentary:
"Even the haters are impressed by my consistency 😂🎯 #NailedIt"
1 week ago
Share →: That depressing moment when you pull up to work and the building is not engulfed in flames.

Commentary:
When the universe misses your memo for 'Spontaneous Office Barbecue Day'! 🔥😂🏢
1 week ago
Share →: Nothing ruins a Friday like realizing it’s only Wednesday.

Commentary:
When you think you're about to hit the weekend jackpot, but life hands you a Wednesday: midweek plot twist! 😂🙈😩
1 week ago
Share →: I downloaded a meditation app. Now I’m stressed about missing sessions.

Commentary:
When you need a meditation app to calm down from your meditation app 😅🧘‍♂️📱
1 week ago
Share →: If I say “with all due respect,” nothing respectful is about to come out of my mouth.

Commentary:
When "with all due respect" is the appetizer, brace yourself for the main course of sass! 😅👀🍽️
1 week ago
Share →: Sex is cool, but have you ever made peace with the horror of being alive.

Commentary:
When life gives you existential dread, just remember: deep breaths and chocolate cake save the day 🍰😅

For even more funny irony quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny irony quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

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Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇹 has copied:

Cats love to wake you up and go back to sleep. It’s part of their culture.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

Sometimes somebody will share something from way back in my timeline, and I’ll think, “Oh God, what all did they see to get there?”

Someone from 🇪🇬 has viewed:

Laptops become possessed with slowness when they see that you are in a hurry.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has bookmarked:

Somebody needs to get my shit together.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has viewed:

Never signed up for a 401k cause there’s no way in hell I can run that far.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has shared:

I used to be a person who couldn’t easily fall asleep, then I got divorced and now I sleep like a baby. Probably unrelated.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has bookmarked:

Sorry I was late, I was disassociating in the shower.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has bookmarked:

I hope the babies I was born with at the hospital are doing good.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has viewed:

The next James Bond should be weird. Like he wears a train conductor’s hat and is afraid of balloons.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has viewed:

Have you ever met someone and thought that you couldn’t wait to spend the rest of your life without them?

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on WeChat:

If stores want to accurately display clothes for people over 40, the mannequins should be laying on a couch.

Just shared via Threads:

If insomnia were a sport, I’d have endorsement deals.

Breaking via TikTok:

I’m a single issue voter. I’m single and it’s an issue.

Shared recently on X:

A big part of aging is accumulating keys and not knowing what they’re for.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

When a woman texts you three questions, you should only answer one. She will love that.

Going viral on Messenger:

One of the biggest struggles of being an adult is deciding what to make for supper. Every. Single. Night.

Trending via Snapchat:

Why do men always think “looking for fun” means sex? Wat if I want us to draw?

Making waves on Reddit:

I’m looking for friends with benefits. And by that I mean friends who have pools, boats and beautiful vacation homes.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Can’t, too busy deleting screenshots of my lock screen.

Reported on Threads:

I hate checking my bank account after having a good time.

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Activity Log ✨

1519 Funny irony quotes

More funny irony quotes 👇

For even more funny irony quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny irony quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

A really good magician could be living in your house and you would never know.

“What’s your music taste?” Don’t know, man. If it sounds good, I’m adding it to the playlist.

He’s a 10 but so is his volume.

Your honor, I have a role to play as the black sheep of the family.

Caffeine is not enough anymore, I need to chew on a power line.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

I like how the Tooth Fairy got the job, and then subbed it out to everyone’s parents. That’s called “business savvy.”

The only difference between hungry and horny is where you insert the cucumber.

Everyone’s a gangster until their doorbell rings.

Livin’ la vida vodka!

I can understand why chickens wake up and scream.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Made it to Friday, but at what cost? Monday is literally in 20 minutes.

I bought a little bag of air today. The company that made it was kind enough to put some potato chips in it as well.

Still holding out hope that these intrusive thoughts are just gas.

Whoever came up with the spelling for “receipt” was an idiopt.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Every time I get the urge to clean, I watch Hoarders and I decide my house isn’t that dirty after all.

Dinosaurs are always described as “roaming” the earth, which is patronizing as hell, I bet they had places to go and important shit to do.

They are all liars, so just pick the tallest and enjoy.

What a bleak life it must be if you’ve never had a drink shoot through your nose when you laugh.

How soon into a new relationship should you let her know you’re an idiot?

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