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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇴 has shared:

Why do women complain about size but moan when fingered?

Someone from 🇬🇭 has shared:

More candlelight, less gaslight, babe.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has shared:

Women swear they be broke… Then, all of a sudden, here comes that Shein delivery.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has shared:

I always wait 3 minutes after each post for the applause to die down.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has downloaded:

I don’t have to take this abuse from you; I’ve got hundreds of people dying to abuse me.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

If you were the birthday gift I bought my wife some months ago, where would you be hiding?

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

I remixed a remix, it was back to normal.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

I started at the bottom, and it’s been downhill ever since.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has shared:

Too many losers and not enough people telling them they’re losers.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has downloaded:

A little time spent not acting your age is never a bad thing.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,281

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Threads:

A good relationship is when she is by your side during bad times to tell you that none of this would have happened if you had just listened to her.

Breaking via Twitch:

Don’t you hate it when you lose things? Like the motivation to do anything.

Spotted on Pinterest:

I don’t know why “you made your bed now lie in it” is a bad thing. It sounds great! I’ll even lie in a bed I didn’t make.

Just landed via Threads:

I hope my email finds you enraged.

Trending via Slack:

I wish I could be as excited about being awake as my dog is about me being awake.

Breaking via WeChat:

Me, telling my kids we’re leaving in 30 minutes: We’re leaving in 5 minutes.

Making waves on Reddit:

I’m sorry, being on social media gave you the impression I’m a social person.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

At my age, I’m worried about tripping and falling, so I wear a helmet. I’m also worried about looking ridiculous, so I carry a skateboard.

Breaking via Discord:

Your future doctor is using ChatGPT to pass med school so you better start eating healthy.

Just landed via Discord:

Not to brag, but I don’t need alcohol to send texts I’ll regret.

125 Funny week quotes

Funny week quotes tackle the rollercoaster of highs, lows, and those is-it-Friday-yet moments that make up our workweek! 😂📅 Whether it’s surviving Monday, celebrating Friday’s arrival, or realizing that the weekend was way too short, these quotes remind us that every week is an adventure in itself. Because when the week is tough, laughter is the best way to make it through! 😆💼🚀

New funny week quotes 👇

For even more funny week quotes, hit next 👇

All funny week quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

45 shares on Reddit this month:

Being an adult means your pain never goes away, it just migrates to a new location in your body.

53 shares on X this month:

Sorry, I can’t hang out. I don’t know enough words.

73 shares on Messenger this month:

Me: This is my favorite. I would like to buy this exact same item of clothing again. The fashion industry: No.

35 shares on Discord this month:

I need to go back to Friday. I want to do my weekend differently.

76 shares on Messenger this month:

Masturbation is easy, but choosing a video is hard.

35 shares on Facebook this month:

Watching Unsolved Mysteries and getting mad when they don’t solve the mystery at the end.

15 shares on Reddit this month:

You need a twins name suggestion? How about Kate and DupliKate?

19 shares on Discord this month:

I need something good to watch while I’m on my phone.

66 shares on Facebook this month:

And so ends another week without me getting rich unexpectedly.

11 shares on Slack this month:

I don’t want to alarm anyone, but there’s only 365 shopping days left until Christmas.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Maybe Rome was built in a day. I wasn’t there.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Perhaps we should have further developed natural intelligence before venturing into artificial intelligence.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I will never forget when my dad had a guy from Verizon call me in middle school to tell me that I was using more data than Obama and that I need to stop.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Me gasping and flipping off the vultures as they circle above the running track.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I’d rather be spotted in a strip club than a Subway.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

You look like the type of person that would fart in bed and Dutch Oven yourself.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

My last husband’s name is Don. I just added an E to it and walked away.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Having leftover pizza for breakfast is an actual blessing.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

“You’re an adult, maybe it’s time to stop fighting with people on the internet.”

20 folks are currently checking 👀

An email so annoying, you wanna return the computer to the store.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,663

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇦 has viewed:

High school crushes were crazy because, why the hell was I running all over school just to catch a glimpse of him.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has viewed:

When I bark at a dog, I always worry that I might have inadvertently said something wrong.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has bookmarked:

It seems a little unfair that the people who want to go to bed have to put the people to bed who don’t want to go to bed.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

Why do they have to make things childproof when I’m still functioning at a kindergarten level of dexterity?

Someone from 🇲🇭 has downloaded:

Some people post such depressing love shit that I start to miss their exes myself!

Someone from 🇹🇿 has downloaded:

I bring a sort of “this isn’t actually urgent” vibe to the workplace that managers don’t like.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has viewed:

I’m never single for too long, you gotta catch me while you can.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has viewed:

Who develops the algorithm? I want to speak to the manager.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has viewed:

The one thing I think most parents need to realize is, there’s absolutely no secrets that your child doesn’t share about you in the classroom.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has copied:

There are some websites where my password management strategy is to just hit “Forgot my password” every time I need to log in.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Snapchat:

It’s like 10,000 lies when all you need is the files.

Spotted on Slack:

The idea that the zombies in the 28 Days series exist entirely in Britain is genuinely hilarious. The rest of the world saw that and was like, “Yeah, they can handle it on their own.”

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

Does anyone actually know how to pronounce Worcestershire sauce correctly, or do we all just stumble through it and hope for the best?

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

I don’t need the audio tour at the museum, I have my teen to provide critical commentary the entire time.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Perhaps moths don’t seek the light, but are simply fleeing the darkness.

Going viral on Discord:

“Treat yourself. You deserve it,” she says while adding the shoes to her cart.

Going viral on Reddit:

Nudes are played out. Send me a video of you reading out loud so I know you’re not dumb.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

If you don’t realize that you’re a werewolf, then you’re actually an unawarewolf.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

When your children are teenagers, it’s important to have a dog so that someone in the house is happy to see you.

Shared recently on Reddit:

It’s almost time to switch from my everyday anxiety to my fancy Christmas anxiety.

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