Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • It’s like ten thousand tweets when all you need is a life.
  • The planet is fine. The people are fucked.
  • 30s: Oh look, a dance floor! 50s: Oh look, a couch!
  • Toddlers are like puppies, they don’t care if they’re dirty and smelly and they both have an affinity exploring the trash bin.
  • Last night my guardian angel came to me, covered me up, gave me a kiss on the forehead and whispered in my ear: “You’re a pain in the ass!”
  • It’s only 9am and I’ve already ruined my son’s entire life by giving him the banana with the brown spot on it.