Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • When a man is a good cook, that cancels out like three red flags.
  • “Hey you!” is short for “I have no idea what your name is.”
  • Twitter is the black sheep of the web, always in the corner, loudly arguing with itself.
  • My wife is pretty excited about going away this weekend so I’m not sure she knows I’m coming with her.
  • I asked myself if I was the problem and we said no.
  • My two moods are eating a breakfast sandwich or wishing I was eating a breakfast sandwich.