Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Ah, the circle of life: waking up just to look forward to going back to bed 😴🔄 Who said motivation doesn't strike early in the morning? 🌞 #SleepIsLife"

back, bed, humor, i, me, minutes, morning, relatable, sleep, tiredness, wait, waking, waking up

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I would like even faster food.

2 months ago

convenience, craving, even, fast, fast food, faster, food, humor, i, joke
I had too much to think last night.

1 day ago

humor, i, last, much, night, overthinking, think, thinking, too
Sorry I’m late, my dog was sleeping in the shape of a donut and I had to take so many photos.

2 months ago

animal, cute, cute animal, distraction, dog, donut, funny moment, humor, i, late, moment, pet, photos, procrastination, shape, sleeping, sorry, take
The worst thing I’ve seen as a paramedic is my paycheck.

2 months ago

healthcare, humor, irony, job, money, paramedic, paycheck, profession, seen, thing, workplace, worst
Dating apps are no place for meeting your soulmate. The best way to find your soulmate is to tweet really good.

2 months ago

app, apps, best, communication, dating, dating app, good, humor, media, meeting, place, social, social media, soulmate, tweet
I got my patience from waiting half the day to download a song from Limewire.

2 months ago

day, download, half, i, Limewire, music, nostalgia, patience, song, technology, waiting

Funny Quotes Collections

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Social Media Stars ⭐

90 shares on X this month:

You ever wake up in the morning and your first thought is ‘I can’t wait to go to bed tonight’?

80 shares on Messenger this month:

Not only is it not Friday, it’s not even Thursday.

72 shares on Messenger this month:

Spiders are the only web developers who love finding bugs.

75 shares on Slack this month:

Bro, you’re fine. You just need an impossible sequence of events to play out in perfect order against all odds and you’ll be fine.

80 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Wishing all the contacts in my phone “Merry Christmas, I hope you get what you deserve” and just letting that work itself out.

29 shares on Slack this month:

My mom didn’t raise a fool. Possibly a psycho, but never a fool.

44 shares on Instagram this month:

I followed a diet but it didn’t follow me back, so I unfollowed it.

35 shares on Twitch this month:

I’m so grateful when people tell me to drive safe, cause then I remember not to drive off that cliff.

44 shares on WeChat this month:

Back then, my parents were afraid of what I would do on the Internet. Today, I’m afraid of what my parents do on the Internet.

53 shares on Twitch this month:

Even before the internet, I always had a little side chat going on in my head.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇲 has bookmarked:

Yes, my sex drive is higher than my will to live, and what about it?

Someone from 🇯🇲 has downloaded:

You can really tell somebody’s mental state by they hair.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has copied:

You’re acting up? Right before Santa Claus comes to town? Unbelievable.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has shared:

I hate when people ask me: “Why are you so quiet?” Because I am. That’s how I function. I don’t ask others, “Why do you talk so much?” It’s rude.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

I have to pee. Story of my life.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has copied:

The only love triangle I’m interested in is between me, my book, and my cozy blanket.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has bookmarked:

Coffee should be free for everyone Monday through Friday.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

Wishing I could hit snooze on life’s alarm clock!

Someone from 🇩🇰 has downloaded:

Cops wake up Christmas morning excited as hell to ignore their family and go sit on the highway with a radar gun for 10 hours.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has copied:

Love that every time I finish a snack I have to wave my hands around to prove to my dog it’s all gone, like I’m cashing him out at a casino or something.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Threads:

Sometimes I miss the time when there was only one idiot per village.

Going viral on Facebook:

My therapist says he can’t take any more of my talk and that I should join a group. So, here I am.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Opening up is like talking to a cop: anything you say can and will be used against you.

Making waves on Slack:

Slim Shady implies the existence of Thicc Sunny.

Seen just now on Twitch:

My favourite yoga pose is the one where you lay really still and do nothing.

Going viral on Facebook:

80 percent of my life now is just “hmmmm… should I bring my jacket or not?”

Just shared via Pinterest:

I’m really hoping money falls from the sky this week, or else I’m doomed.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

No more looking back in anger. It’s time to look forward in anger.

Going viral on Messenger:

I talk to my dog like she’s human and, like most humans, she looks at me like I’m an idiot.

Shared recently on WeChat:

My favorite part about talking to my teens is when they give me direct eye contact, listen intently, nod understandingly and then do the exact opposite of what I just said.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

“I can’t wait to go back to bed tonight!” Me, 5 minutes after waking up.

Keep the laugh going 😂

I would like even faster food.

I had too much to think last night.

Sorry I’m late, my dog was sleeping in the shape of a donut and I had to take so many photos.

The worst thing I’ve seen as a paramedic is my paycheck.

Dating apps are no place for meeting your soulmate. The best way to find your soulmate is to tweet really good.

I got my patience from waiting half the day to download a song from Limewire.

Social Media Stars ⭐

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