Trendy Funny Quotes

  • How you conduct yourself when using plastic wrap is the real you.
  • My company promotes diversity. We’d never hire twins.
  • One week without chocolate. I can no longer hear anything in my left eye.
  • “So if I had kids, my kids would never…” Spoiler: Yes, they would.
  • My boyfriend moved in with me straight from Hotel Mama. In a way, I’m now a single parent.
  • No, I’m not stressed. I just constantly grind my teeth and clench my jaw for fun.