Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Tomorrow? Oh, you mean that mythical land where I have my life together? 🤷‍♂️ Who needs plans when you can just wing it and hope for the best, am I right? 😅 #LivingInTheMoment"

doing, expectations, hate, humor, i, life, me, people, planning, procrastination, today, tomorrow, uncertainty

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Yeah, I’ll get up soon, I just need to look at the internet first. Yes, the whole thing.

0

2 months ago

delay, distraction, humor, i, internet, just, laziness, need, procrastination, thing, whole, yes
Feeling feral. Better make some mac and cheese.

0

3 weeks ago

better, cheese, comfort, comfort food, cooking, feeling, feeling feral, feral, food, mac, mac and cheese, mood
At my next therapy session, I will be discussing the trauma I’ve been dealing with ever since the grocery store layout was altered.

0

5 months ago

change, dealing, discussing, ever, frustration, grocery, grocery store, health, humor, i, layout, mental, mental health, next, session, shopping, store, therapy, trauma
Grant me the serenity to supernaturally change the things I cannot accept.

0

2 months ago

accept, acceptance, change, grant, humor, i, irony, me, parody, serenity, supernatural, things
People say I act like I don’t care. It’s not an act.

0

2 months ago

act, care, humor, i, indifference, people, personality, sarcasm, say
“Do you have any hobbies?” Lately, I’ve been really into panicking.

0

1 month ago

anxiety, hobby, humor, panicking, stress

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

30 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Hate Google’s Gemini. If I wanted to get misinformation from a Gemini, I’d talk to my mother.

31 shares on Twitch this month:

My husband and I were doing yard work, but I started a fight so I could storm off into the air conditioning.

89 shares on Messenger this month:

Ruined a Ferrari guy’s day today by telling him that I loved his Corvette.

11 shares on Facebook this month:

Quitting my job to pursue my true passion: not working.

64 shares on Reddit this month:

I’m just impressed by how ugly I’m willing to look in public these day.

21 shares on X this month:

I just sneezed into my elbow and now I’m waiting for a preschool teacher to praise me.

89 shares on YouTube this month:

“Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This)” is now 40 years old. If you have an earworm now, you also have back pain.

85 shares on Reddit this month:

I hope this email finds you at relative peace with the paradox of existence.

89 shares on Telegram this month:

When I was a little kid, I used to think, “This little pig went to market,” meant it was going shopping!

50 shares on Discord this month:

I am both dumber and smarter than you think. Do not estimate me.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

There are always new uncomplimentary angles to view yourself from. Keep contorting!

Someone from 🇺🇿 has copied:

I’ve arrived like the sun: blinding, necessary, and impossible to ignore.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

I’m not lazy, I’m on energy-saving mode.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has viewed:

No more bare minimum, I want the moon and the stars. Maybe even a planet at this point.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has shared:

Literally no one understands something more completely than a woman in a meeting who starts a question with “Just so I understand …”

Someone from 🇧🇬 has bookmarked:

I be like “communication is the key” then put my phone on do not disturb.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has viewed:

I’m not always annoying, sometimes I sleep too.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has copied:

Just got chills imagining what Tom and Jerry could accomplish if they just worked together for once.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has viewed:

Maybe dogs are smarter than us because they found a way to get fed and housed without having to go to college and get a job.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has downloaded:

Kinda miss when crushes were butterflies instead of complex emotional calculations about compatibility and red flags.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Facebook:

They’re making me get out of bed.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

The actors you see in movies are probably home by now.

Just shared via Twitch:

I get it, orcas. Sometimes you just need to ruin a yacht to feel something.

Trending via WeChat:

(Flirting) What’s every single thing you’ve ever thought?

Spotted on Instagram:

I drink all this water and for what. Just to pee? This planet is a prison.

Live now on Pinterest:

Career anxiety hitting at random hours of the day.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

It’s never too early to start making bad decisions.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Farmers markets should be for vegetables — not for millennials unloading their failed Etsy-store arts and crafts.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Fake laughing at work is exhausting as hell, just leave me alone, bro.

Going viral on Messenger:

The sexual tension between me and not finishing the last 2 episodes of a drama.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I hate when people ask me what I’m doing tomorrow, I don’t even know what I’m doing today.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Yeah, I’ll get up soon, I just need to look at the internet first. Yes, the whole thing.

Feeling feral. Better make some mac and cheese.

At my next therapy session, I will be discussing the trauma I’ve been dealing with ever since the grocery store layout was altered.

Grant me the serenity to supernaturally change the things I cannot accept.

People say I act like I don’t care. It’s not an act.

“Do you have any hobbies?” Lately, I’ve been really into panicking.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨