Trendy Funny Quotes

  • Without freedom of speech we wouldn’t know who the idiots are.
  • I don’t miss calls, I stare at them.
  • I never had kids because little kids see too many ghosts and that’s something I’d rather not know about.
  • At bedtime, I ceremonially move the claw clip from my hair to the bag of chips, signifying the end of the day.
  • I like my women like I like my glasses: thick, transparent, and uneven.
  • Everyone is awful in their own special way.