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Commentary:
"Ah, the secret to a peaceful life – never argue, just confidently enlighten others about your undeniable brilliance! 💁‍♂️💡 Who needs arguments when you have the power of explanation on your side? 🤣 #AlwaysRight"

argue, argument, confidence, conversation, explain, humor, i, just, right, sarcasm

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

UK rappers be like “I’ve got a posh flat and my bird is very comely, I own more motors than the marchioness of cholmondeley”

1 month ago
bird, British, Cholmondeley, comely, flat, humor, i, lifestyle, marchioness, motors, own, posh, rappers, UK
Today I started gardening. I planted myself in front of the TV and I sat there the entire day.

1 month ago
activity, day, gardening, home, home activity, humor, procrastination, relaxation, today, TV
If I ever die on some hill, rest assured, something fishy is going on.

1 month ago
assurance, context, death, die, ever, fishy, going, hill, humor, i, rest, something
“You’re at the age where both 1990 and 2003 are flirting with you.”

5 months ago
1990, 2003, age, both, flirting, humor, nostalgia, where, year
Why do chefs always have to cut everything so fast? It’s just an onion man, why don’t you relax?

1 month ago
always, chefs, cooking, cut, everything, fast, humor, just, kitchen, man, onion, relax, speed
Is it smoky eye or were you wearing mascara and your eyes got itchy?

1 month ago
beauty, comment, eye, eyes, funny comment, humor, itchy, itchy eye, joke, makeup, mascara, smoky, smoky eye

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇿 has downloaded:

By the time I remember to text back, it be too disrespectful to even do it.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has shared:

I had a dream about you. You were stupid there, too.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has viewed:

Grant me the supernatural ability to change the things I cannot accept.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has downloaded:

If you show her you care, she will keep you as a spare.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has bookmarked:

Don’t check on your introverted friends this time of year. They’re probably turning their lights off and pretending they’re not home.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has bookmarked:

Cars should come with a secondary smaller “sorry” horn for when you do something a lil silly by accident.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has bookmarked:

This can’t be the same body that used to be able to pull all nighters.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Facebook:

You should never forget where you came from. That’s probably where your keys are.

Just shared via Threads:

The feminine urge to open a coffee shop that’s also a library, a bakery, and a flower shop.

Breaking via Reddit:

I hope I don’t die of something stupid like old age, I want a piano to fall on my head.

Freshly posted on X:

Had chicken and egg for dinner because I wanted to eat the whole family.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

If my cats are going to insist upon me getting up early, they’re going to have to learn how to make coffee.

Spreading quickly via X:

“It’s all in your head!” Correct! Unfortunately, I am also in there.

Making waves on TikTok:

I shall have another coffee, for I am sleeping standing.

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Activity Log ✨

I never argue, I just explain why I’m right.

UK rappers be like “I’ve got a posh flat and my bird is very comely, I own more motors than the marchioness of cholmondeley”

Today I started gardening. I planted myself in front of the TV and I sat there the entire day.

If I ever die on some hill, rest assured, something fishy is going on.

“You’re at the age where both 1990 and 2003 are flirting with you.”

Why do chefs always have to cut everything so fast? It’s just an onion man, why don’t you relax?

Is it smoky eye or were you wearing mascara and your eyes got itchy?

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

I cannot imagine being in high school right now. Imagine the world is eating itself alive and you’re in school.

You gotta act cool, calm, and collected around liquid eyeliner because it can sense your fear.

Despite removing all the stains, I still lost my job as a church window cleaner.

If you’re riding a bike in New York City, it means you care about your health. Riding one in Tennessee means you got a DUI.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Who develops the algorithm? I want to speak to the manager.

I’ve convinced myself bumblebees don’t sting because they’re too fluffy and cute.

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

I can’t believe Halloween was 10 pounds ago.

I don’t want to brag but I found a recipe online, and then within three weeks not only made the recipe, but closed the tab on my browser.

One day I’ll do amazing things. Today I’ll be satisfied if I don’t spill food on my lap.

In your 20s, there will be a cat, and it is very important to get that cat and spend so much money on it.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Do you remember when you looked through binoculars upside down and everyone was really far away? That was nice.

To all of you who have never tried blindfold archery: You don’t know what you’re missing!

They should invent a customer service center that isn’t “currently experiencing higher than normal call volume”.

Can someone write me a note to get out of being a responsible adult?

I was guest-starring on The Love Boat when you woke me up. You’re dead to me.

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I never argue, I just explain why I’m right.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

UK rappers be like “I’ve got a posh flat and my bird is very comely, I own more motors than the marchioness of cholmondeley”

Today I started gardening. I planted myself in front of the TV and I sat there the entire day.

If I ever die on some hill, rest assured, something fishy is going on.

“You’re at the age where both 1990 and 2003 are flirting with you.”

Why do chefs always have to cut everything so fast? It’s just an onion man, why don’t you relax?

Is it smoky eye or were you wearing mascara and your eyes got itchy?

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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