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New funny quotes: 6 this month

15,831 funny quotes and pics

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Updated: Jun 2, 2026

 

 

 

 

 

296 Funny confidence quotes

Funny confidence quotes are here to remind you that strutting through life with swagger — even when you’re winging it — can be downright hilarious! 😎😂 Whether it’s bold declarations, over-the-top self-love, or “fake it till you make it” moments, these quotes show that confidence and comedy go hand in hand. Walk tall and laugh louder! 💁‍♂️✨🕺

Knowing I’ve been called crazy, but never ugly, is how I sleep at night.

Posted onMay 30, 2026

Don’t let the fact that I’m deeply unserious distract you from the fact that you’re in the presence of a genius.

Posted onMay 30, 2026

In my years of experience, people who disagree with me are usually wrong.

Posted onMay 30, 2026

I may not be the smartest or most athletic man in the world. There’s no second part to this, keep scrolling.

Posted onMay 30, 2026

Nothing makes me feel more powerful than when I write ‘furthermore’ in an email.

Posted onMay 30, 2026

Men who tell their woman she’s pretty, for no particular reason, keep that shit up.

Posted onMay 30, 2026

I don’t think people are actually getting any dumber. I think stupid people have just become way more confident.

Posted onMay 30, 2026

The hottest I ever look is when I’m brushing my teeth in my underwear, but it’s very much a ‘tree falls in the woods’ situation.

Posted onMay 30, 2026

Imagine thinking you have all the answers.

Posted onMay 30, 2026

I’m heading to the beach without a beach body.

Posted onMay 30, 2026

Everybody looks sexier when they are happy.

Posted onMay 30, 2026

What’s it called when you’re super insecure but, at the same time, you can walk into a room full of people and think you’re better than everyone else?

Posted onMay 30, 2026

I have high standards for dating because I’m a high-quality woman, and you wouldn’t want me any other way.

Posted onMay 30, 2026

Just once, I’d like to experience the confidence of a goose walking directly into traffic.

Posted onMay 29, 2026

Being underestimated is my favorite plot twist.

Posted onMay 29, 2026

I’ve been a main character since birth.

Posted onMay 29, 2026

From a very young age, I knew that everyone was wrong and I was right.

Posted onMay 29, 2026

I love mirrors because they remind me of how pretty I am.

Posted onMay 29, 2026

We’ve historically done extremely well with regime change, so this should be a piece of cake.

Posted onMay 29, 2026

The best thing about the internet is that you’re never the dumbest one here.

Posted onMay 29, 2026

Unfortunately for things, they have no choice but to work out for me.

Posted onMay 29, 2026

The best weight you’ll ever lose is the weight of other people’s opinions.

Posted onMay 29, 2026

New year; new me. Just kidding. I’m already awesome.

Posted onMay 29, 2026

Maybe the problem is that I’m cooler than any man I’ve ever met.

Posted onMay 29, 2026

As a beautiful woman, sometimes the most powerful thing you can say is “ew.”

Posted onMay 29, 2026

If you’ve never been hit with gay allegations, you’re not fly enough.

Posted onMay 29, 2026

Being sexy is just the cherry on top. I’m actually a genius and the sweetest girl ever.

Posted onMay 28, 2026

I’ve never used a semicolon with 100% confidence.

Posted onMay 28, 2026

I look so pretty today. I should go for a walk and let the people enjoy this.

Posted onMay 28, 2026

I like people who make eye contact like they know something I don’t.

Posted onMay 28, 2026

Unfortunately, a great many problems in life can be solved by just being hotter.

Posted onMay 28, 2026

The lion does not concern himself with social proof.

Posted onMay 28, 2026

Imagine having a negative opinion of me, and I have no idea who you are.

Posted onMay 28, 2026

I’m gonna dress how I want this summer, and if you think I’m fat, well, so do I.

Posted onMay 28, 2026

Unfortunately for the haters, I will continue to keep being me.

Posted onMay 28, 2026

When people block me, I just assume it’s for my rugged good looks and killer jawline.

Posted onMay 28, 2026

I’m not gonna have a bad day. The day is gonna have a bad me.

Posted onMay 28, 2026

I grew up ugly, so I had to be funny, and then got hot in my twenties, so that’s how I became perfect.

Posted onMay 28, 2026

I named my eraser Confidence because it gets smaller after every mistake I make.

Posted onMay 28, 2026

I got a bumper sticker that says, “Honk if you think I’m pretty.” Sometimes I just sit at green lights until I feel better about myself.

Posted onMay 28, 2026

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