Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"If Nike ever adopts this new slogan, sales would skyrocket as people proudly flaunt their imaginary athletic achievements. 🏃‍♂️💨 Just remember, it only counts if you post about it on social media! #JustSayYouDidIt"

advertising, change, charge, corporate, ever, honesty, humor, i, ID, just, just do it, Nike, nobody, responsibility, say, slogan

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Why’s it always “NYC smells like pee” and never “my pee smells like the greatest city in the world”?

0

2 months ago

always, city, humor, irony, never, NYC, pee, smell, world
Telling the cop I’ll give him his nose back if he lowers his firearm.

0

5 months ago

back, cop, firearm, give, humor, joke, negotiation, nose, police, telling, threat
There’s a cougar warning in my neighborhood, but apparently it’s just a big cat. I bought a case of wine coolers for nothing.

0

2 months ago

apparently, big, big cat, case, casual, cat, coolers, cougar, cougar warning, humor, i, just, misunderstanding, neighborhood, neighborhood safety, nothing, safety, warning, wine, wine coolers
But babe, that’s my emotional support Lord of the Rings Extended Edition.

0

2 months ago

babe, culture, edition, emotional, emotional support, extended, extended edition, fandom, geek, geek culture, humor, lord, Lord of the Rings, movie, relationship, rings, support
Having a loose stool means two completely different things depending on if you are a nurse or a bartender.

0

2 months ago

bartender, context, difference, drinking, humor, job, job difference, loose, loose stool, means, medical, nurse, profession, stool, things
My favorite dance move is trying to get out of my own way.

0

2 months ago

activity, dance, dance move, favorite, getting, getting out, humor, move, own, self, trying

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

21 shares on Reddit this month:

Ok. I blinked 182 times. What happens now?

17 shares on WeChat this month:

Every house is a dream house when you can’t afford one.

92 shares on Reddit this month:

Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.

72 shares on YouTube this month:

When a man is a good cook, that cancels out like three red flags.

66 shares on Slack this month:

I can’t go to war, I have to water my plants.

84 shares on YouTube this month:

I’m capable of doing a lot of things but listening to people chew their food is not one of them.

60 shares on TikTok this month:

I just bought a universal remote. This changes everything.

71 shares on TikTok this month:

I should go to jail so I can focus on the gym.

53 shares on YouTube this month:

A weekend in a log cabin with a hot tub sounds perfect right now.

50 shares on Telegram this month:

Spiders are the only web developers who love finding bugs.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇯 has downloaded:

I don’t get enough credit for acting far less crazy than I actually am.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

Nobody calls you old more than people 2 years younger than you.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has shared:

Toilets are not a crime scene, traces may be removed!

Someone from 🇦🇬 has bookmarked:

If you’ve never been hit with gay allegations, you’re not fly enough.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

“That’s an interesting take,” I say, not listening.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has viewed:

Need a permanent vacuum for unwanted thoughts.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has copied:

Diarrhea awareness week starts today. Runs through Sunday.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

Men used to go to war, now they want to be the little spoon.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has bookmarked:

The thing about being 50+ is that whenever an opportunity to pee is available – you’re wise to take it.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has shared:

When you scream into your pillow, the memory foam never forgets.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on X:

My kidnappers sent me back early with a full apology, some money, and several of their fingers.

Making waves on Reddit:

Sleeping in is the most efficient way to find out which morning rituals you can actually do without.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Hey dude, I recently became omniscient, and well, you fell off in every universe.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

You want me to attend a work meeting? The thing that killed Julius Caesar?

Spotted on WeChat:

Having a pool is so neat. All of your friends are suddenly interested to catch up on the hottest days of the year.

Just shared via X:

My favorite game is guessing if my headache is due to dehydration, migraine, malnutrition, stress, lack of sleep, poor posture, or a brain tumor.

Trending via Slack:

I really don’t care what happens to me romantically anymore.

Going bananas on Facebook:

Aren’t you a little old to be a bully?

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Can you check if my lips taste like cherries?

Spotted on Instagram:

70% of marriage is yelling “What” from a different room.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

If I were in charge of Nike, I’d change the slogan to “Just Say You Did It. Nobody Ever Checks.”

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Why’s it always “NYC smells like pee” and never “my pee smells like the greatest city in the world”?

Telling the cop I’ll give him his nose back if he lowers his firearm.

There’s a cougar warning in my neighborhood, but apparently it’s just a big cat. I bought a case of wine coolers for nothing.

But babe, that’s my emotional support Lord of the Rings Extended Edition.

Having a loose stool means two completely different things depending on if you are a nurse or a bartender.

My favorite dance move is trying to get out of my own way.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨