Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Flirting level: crow! 🌟 Who needs jewelry when you can impress with all things shiny and sparkly? Just imagine the magpie envy 😂🦅 #BirdRomance"

affection, both, bring, crows, gift, humor, ID, love, relationship, shiny, shiny thing, thing, things

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

A college education is one of the few things a person is willing to pay for and not get.

0

2 months ago

college, college education, education, expectation, financial, financial investment, humor, investment, irony, life, not get, pay, person, student, student life
I’m just a crazy person looking for a crazy person who finds me completely normal.

0

2 months ago

connection, crazy, crazy person, dating, humor, just, looking, love, me, normal, person, relationship, self-perception
If it was really a smart phone, it would have recognize that it was an ignored call, not missed.

0

2 months ago

call, humor, ignored, ignored call, irony, missed, missed call, phone, smart, smart phone, technology
Amazing how fast my addiction to my phone is cured the moment I get a phone call.

0

2 months ago

addiction, amazing, call, cure, fast, humor, i, irony, moment, observation, phone, technology
This post is highly top-secret. You need to forget that you’ve seen it immediately.

0

2 months ago

confidentiality, forget, humor, joke, memory, need, post, secret, seen, top-secret
Am I the only one who wonders why the Flintstones celebrate Christmas?

0

2 months ago

am, cartoon, celebrate, Christmas, Flintstones, holiday, humor, i, irony, time, time travel, travel, wonder

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

87 shares on WeChat this month:

The awkward moment when someone’s zipper is down and you don’t know whether to tell them or not.

35 shares on Facebook this month:

Ancestors survived five mass extinctions on earth for me to be killed by a house cat I was trying to put a Christmas sweater on.

29 shares on WeChat this month:

Way too many low IQ conspiracy theories floating around. Give me high IQ conspiracy theories.

39 shares on WhatsApp this month:

It’s too bad he never woke up and chose violence. “Bob Ross, mob boss” has a nice ring to it.

74 shares on YouTube this month:

Whole crypto scheme is built on people too dumb for crypto that aren’t self-aware enough to realize it.

37 shares on Telegram this month:

Avocado is just green butter.

86 shares on TikTok this month:

Hearing my voice in recording makes me wanna apologize to every person I talked to.

93 shares on Threads this month:

I was brought up in the wild by hyenas. Times were hard, food was scarce but we had some great laughs.

34 shares on Slack this month:

My body is a “wonder what happened” land.

77 shares on Facebook this month:

Life hack: You don’t need white noise to sleep when you have constant ringing in your ears.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇿 has downloaded:

Gosh, being a princess is exhausting.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has downloaded:

Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has copied:

When my husband says he’ll just be a minute, I know I have enough time to watch an entire television series, paint the house, or go on a quest.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has downloaded:

I want someone who will look at me the same way I look at chocolate cake.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has shared:

I’m going to start walking around in my yard all day in a bathrobe so my neighbors will build that privacy fence I always wanted.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

I just heard someone refer to Texas as “Howdy Arabia” and I still haven’t stopped laughing.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has viewed:

At this point, I’m not sure if my house is a mess or my mess is a house.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has viewed:

It’s funny how when you’re at work, “Go to hell” comes out as “No problem.”

Someone from 🇰🇳 has copied:

When God closes a door, he opens a window. Unfortunately, we are in a submarine.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has copied:

I am a full grown adult. Now listen to me discuss the various plot holes in Paw Patrol.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Facebook:

Blocking anyone who tries to motivate me.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Welcome to downtown where the crosswalk signals are merely suggestions and you hope the puddles are water.

Just shared via WeChat:

If “live each day as if it’s your last” means being paralyzed with anxiety and a sense of impending doom, then I am absolutely nailing it.

Going viral on Reddit:

When a man likes you, he talks to you every day, and apparently, when you start to like him back, he is very busy and can’t talk at all. That’s how it works.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Getting an extra 20 minutes in the day when someone cancels a meeting is like finding a penny on the ground. Not gonna use it for anything, but wow, am I excited.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

“Can you multitask?” Yes, actually I am losing my mind and chilling at the same time.

Broadcasted on Threads:

It’s so hot, I just saw a squirrel fanning its nuts.

Going viral on Twitch:

They should make the last foot of dental floss red so you know when you’re about to run out.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

I’m obsessed with adding a second completely unnecessary tweet to all my tweets, like, oh, you thought I was done.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Have to write a note to my kid’s first grade teacher, and now I’m stressed out about my handwriting.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

If we were both crows, I’d bring you shiny things.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

A college education is one of the few things a person is willing to pay for and not get.

I’m just a crazy person looking for a crazy person who finds me completely normal.

If it was really a smart phone, it would have recognize that it was an ignored call, not missed.

Amazing how fast my addiction to my phone is cured the moment I get a phone call.

This post is highly top-secret. You need to forget that you’ve seen it immediately.

Am I the only one who wonders why the Flintstones celebrate Christmas?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨