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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇷 has bookmarked:

We’re living in increasingly unfergalicious times.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has shared:

“Well at least I don’t have to wake up any more.” Is what I want my tombstone to say.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

I’m so lazy that I’ll break my tooth trying to get this tag off before I get up and get a scissor.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has copied:

I don’t understand why bugs come inside when they have a whole outside to themselves.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has copied:

Yeah, I have a drinking problem. It’s called dehydration.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has bookmarked:

You don’t scare me. I used to have to call and ask a girl’s parents if she was there.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has copied:

This too shall pass… It may pass like a kidney stone, but it will pass.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has copied:

Dude, we’re gonna be treating others how we want to be treated later if you wanna pull up.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has viewed:

My neighbor is having some kind of party and didn’t invite me. I guess I have to call the cops again.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has shared:

If you knock down a policeman, they’ll get backup.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

789 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,951

Funny Quotes Topics

13,923

Funny Quotes Images

10,951

43 minutes ago

3,422

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Threads:

I’m so hungry, I could eat my own cooking.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

“I’ll worry about it next time.” Me pissing off future me.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Grammar is important. It’s the difference between feeling your nuts and feeling you’re nuts.

Just shared via Twitch:

“Treat yourself. You deserve it,” she says while adding the shoes to her cart.

Making waves on Threads:

Foo fighters still fighting foo.

Spreading quickly via X:

I only look up to people that are taller than me and really that’s about the extent of it.

Seen just now on Slack:

I was living in the moment until I was evicted.

Spotted on Twitch:

Sometimes I wonder what happened to the people who asked me for directions.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Sometimes I sneeze so loud and hard I think I’m a dad.

Just landed via Telegram:

If you’re a squatter, every day is leg day.

I’m not even a 2nd choice, I’m like an 8th choice, sometimes a 10th.

6 months ago

I’m not even a 2nd choice, I’m like an 8th choice, sometimes a 10th.

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Commentary:
"Ah, the elusive 8th or 10th choice – the ninja of choices, silently waiting in the shadows to strike when least expected! 🦸‍♂️ Don't worry, sometimes being the underdog has its perks. Embrace your inner MVP of the 8th and 10th choices! 🥇"

choice, dating, eighth, eighth choice, humor, rejection, second, second choice, self-deprecation, tenth, tenth choice

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

789 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,951

Funny Quotes Topics

13,923

Funny Quotes Images

10,951

43 minutes ago

3,430

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇬 has copied:

Cigarette smell gotta be one of the worst smells in the history of smells.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has downloaded:

The week before your period doesn’t make any sense… until you realize it’s the week before your period.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has bookmarked:

Debugging is like being the detective in a crime where you are also the murderer. Following the clues of an idiot.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has bookmarked:

Are you okay, babe? You’ve barely moved in mysterious ways recently.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has downloaded:

This gum has my stomach convinced food is coming.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has bookmarked:

I’m not saying I’m messy, but if Copperfield knew what I can make disappear, he’d be jealous.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has copied:

Apparently, responding to a wedding invitation with “maybe next time” is wrong. I know that now.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has bookmarked:

You cannot trust me at a zoo because I’ll release the animals.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has shared:

Your secret is safe with me because I don’t care.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

Wow, another wooden ball. Would it kill avocado makers to put a different toy in there?

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Snapchat:

Breakups are hard, but have you ever been disappointed in the food you ordered?

Making waves on Twitch:

You are the wind beneath my overly sensitive, motion-activated floodlight.

Reported on Facebook:

Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow internet to see who they really are.

Going viral on Messenger:

Hate when I have to be mean. Why would you push a sweet girl this far?

Just shared via Twitch:

When I’m behind a slow car, I steer my car a little to the right so the people behind me can see that it isn’t my fault.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

“I asked ChatGPT.” Okay, well, I asked my mom.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

I hate when I offer someone food and they accept it.

Trending via Telegram:

Everyone thinks they will be the first person in history to maintain their dignity while posting online.

Trending via Instagram:

What can I buy my wife for Valentine’s Day that finally proves to her once and for all that I have absolutely no idea what she likes or who she is?

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Oftentimes, I like the idea of an activity. The actual doing of said activity, not so much.

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