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"Life as a giraffe must be one tall order…literally! 🦒🤮 Just imagine the struggle of trying to get rid of that food from all the way up there! 😂 #TallProblems"

animals, being, funny situation, giraffe, humor, imagination, imagine, nausea, situation, throw, throw up

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I was at a funeral yesterday and spiced things up by walking over to complete strangers and saying “Ignore what everyone else thinks. I, personally, have no issue with you being here”.

1 month ago
awkwardness, being, complete, else, everyone, funeral, here, humor, i, ignore, inappropriate, interaction, issue, lightheartedness, opinion, over, personal, personal opinion, saying, social, social interaction, spice, strangers, things, walking, yesterday
Everyone says “Do what makes you happy”, until you push them down the stairs.

1 month ago
consequences, dark, dark humor, everyone, expectation, happiness, happy, humor, irony, push, stairs
Don’t even get into my car if you’re just gonna scream every time I hit something.

1 month ago
car, driving, even, every, hit, humor, i, just, passenger, reaction, scream, something, time
I hate it when people threaten to come over. Now I’ve got to do 2 years of housework in 30 minutes.

1 month ago
2, 30, cleaning, hate, housework, humor, i, minutes, over, people, preparation, procrastination, threaten, time
I’ve been ghosted enough to add paranormal investigator to my resume.

1 month ago
dating, ghosted, humor, investigator, paranormal, relationships, resume
The only thing limiting what you can put in a sandwich is your imagination and the laws of physics.

1 month ago
creativity, food, humor, imagination, joke, limit, physics, put, sandwich, thing

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

It’s a beautiful morning. Lots of people out walking their phones.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has copied:

I bought some coconut shampoo today. I got halfway home before I thought, “I don’t even have a coconut!”

Someone from 🇬🇼 has shared:

The new American dream is an alien invasion.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has copied:

The lion does not concern himself at all. The lion is depressed.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has copied:

The best way to teach your kids about taxes is by eating 30 percent of their ice-cream.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has viewed:

One week without chocolate. I can no longer hear anything in my left eye.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has shared:

Why do moths eat sweaters? Have they tried sandwiches or avocados?

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Almost fell asleep while putting on the sweater because it got dark for a moment. That’s all you need to know about my morning state.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

When I say someone is a good doctor, it’s entirely based on the strength of their waiting room Wi-Fi.

Making waves on Pinterest:

That’s me in the corner, that’s me in the spotlight, spreading goat cheese on a bagel.

Breaking via Telegram:

A perfect metaphor for my life would be “Someone trying to stand up in a hammock.”

Shared recently on X:

I never sit around waiting for anyone except for the pizza delivery guy.

Going bananas on Facebook:

“I’m at a point in my life where my favorite thing to do is nothing.”

Going bananas on WeChat:

Hello, my voicemail is currently unavailable. To leave a message please speak slowly and clearly into the nearest toaster.

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Activity Log ✨

Imagine being a giraffe and having to throw up.

Everyone says “Do what makes you happy”, until you push them down the stairs.

Don’t even get into my car if you’re just gonna scream every time I hit something.

I hate it when people threaten to come over. Now I’ve got to do 2 years of housework in 30 minutes.

I’ve been ghosted enough to add paranormal investigator to my resume.

The only thing limiting what you can put in a sandwich is your imagination and the laws of physics.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

I did 30 minutes of chores, time for a 7-hour break.

Might quit my job to focus on summer.

Butterflies all seem so nice but I’ll bet some of them are real bastards.

Most men will receive their first bunch of flowers at their funeral.

Once I shot a man with a paintball gun, just to watch him dye.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

I don’t know how to knit, so I made you a tinfoil hat.

I hate it when I check my transactions history, and everything adds up like damn, so no one stole from me.

To save money, you really just gotta stay at home.

On my way to HR again for nicknaming my coworker “Mastercard” because they take credit for other people’s work.

Tired of looking at a bad screen. Can’t wait to get home and look at a good screen.

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

The phrase “don’t take this the wrong way” has a 0% success rate.

“Stop overthinking.” Oh, wow. Hadn’t considered that. Solved.

A wise man once said: “Yes, darling. You’re right.”

I just shaved my legs and man, the next 7 minutes and 34 seconds before it starts growing back is gonna feel amazing.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Interpretive dance is the best way to answer stupid questions.

Men love to show you a YouTube video. It is a sign of deep respect in their culture.

Being single: When you don’t have to wait for someone to watch the next Netflix episode.

I’m not feeling very worky today.

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Imagine being a giraffe and having to throw up.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I was at a funeral yesterday and spiced things up by walking over to complete strangers and saying “Ignore what everyone else thinks. I, personally, have no issue with you being here”.

Everyone says “Do what makes you happy”, until you push them down the stairs.

Don’t even get into my car if you’re just gonna scream every time I hit something.

I hate it when people threaten to come over. Now I’ve got to do 2 years of housework in 30 minutes.

I’ve been ghosted enough to add paranormal investigator to my resume.

The only thing limiting what you can put in a sandwich is your imagination and the laws of physics.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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