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Commentary:
"Sorry to spin out of your hate radius! 🌀💨 Maybe my spinning chair is just dodging all the negativity coming my way! 😄 #OfficeOlympics"

activity, chair, desk, fast, hate, humor, imagine, just, me, office, spinning, work

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

People keep inviting me to stuff. I miss the pandemic.

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2 months ago

anxiety, event, gatherings, humor, i, introvert, invitation, isolation, keep, me, miss, pandemic, people, social, social anxiety, social event, stuff
The fewer friends at your birthday party means more cake for you. Follow me for more life hacks.

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2 months ago

birthday, cake, celebration, follow, friends, friendship, fun, hack, humor, joke, life, life hack, me, means, party
I get so flattered when butterflies or bees buzz around me. Like, sorry ladies, I’m not a flower, but it’s so sweet that you thought I was. Hehe.

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2 months ago

around, bee, bees, butterfly, buzz, compliment, flattery, flower, humor, i, me, nature, playful, sorry, sweet, thought
Oh, sorry, I can’t right now. I’m imagining some things and worrying about them.

0

2 months ago

activity, excuse, humor, i, imagination, mental, mental activity, oh, overthinking, right, sorry, things, worry, worrying
Every Microsoft Teams invite you get lowers your testosterone by 1-2%

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2 months ago

12, every, humor, invite, meeting, microsoft, productivity, stress, Teams, technology, testosterone, workplace
Instead of working on making myself a better person, I am going to purchase a cool new jacket.

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2 months ago

am, better, better person, choice, cool, fashion, going, humor, i, jacket, making, materialism, myself, new, person, personal, personal choice, priorities, purchase, self-improvement, working

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

19 shares on Slack this month:

Eating watermelon and minding my own business.

10 shares on Pinterest this month:

I told my GPS I needed direction in life, and now it insists on recalculating every hour.

97 shares on Slack this month:

Lost another rap battle by just agreeing with everything the other guy said.

57 shares on Facebook this month:

I was actually a little too thankful yesterday so today I’m going to even it out with some ungratefulness and entitlement.

42 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Quality women really do attract everyone. A bright light always attracts all types of bugs.

21 shares on YouTube this month:

A murder on the dance floor would explain the panic! at the disco.

17 shares on Threads this month:

When they say screen time is bad for you, they just mean the ones at work, right?

22 shares on Slack this month:

You know who’s gonna love you in the end? Your dog.

24 shares on TikTok this month:

Some people identify as funnier than they actually are.

44 shares on Messenger this month:

If a portal opened up in front of me, I’d go in—no questions asked.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇶 has shared:

I bet my soulmate is out there somewhere pretending everything is fine.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has copied:

Imagine hating me and I’m just over here trying to remember how to spell “definitely”.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has copied:

HR has told me to stop saying ‘How stupid can you be?’ to members of staff. They’re worried it’s being taken as a challenge.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has bookmarked:

I put my pants on just like everybody else: when the police tell me to.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

Old Spice doesn’t sound like something you wanna smell.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has copied:

My lips could use some attention today.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has downloaded:

Mondays are for pretending. Real work begins on Tuesday.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has shared:

Oh my God, “unc” means uncool. I thought it meant uncle. Like you’re carrying the energy of someone’s weird uncle.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has shared:

If we keep saving daylight, daylight will never learn to save itself.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has downloaded:

Some people spend a fortune so they can circle the world. I drink some beer and the world circles around me.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on YouTube:

“This isn’t going to end well for you.” Me, alone in the house, to the cake on the counter.

Just shared via YouTube:

Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth.

Spotted on WeChat:

50% of parenting is just trying to decide if that noise is worth walking up all of those stairs.

Spotted on Instagram:

I would just once like to feel as powerful as a toddler throwing their sippy cup whilst sitting atop their high chair.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Having a crush is so stupid. Like, why is this dude in my head at 8 am?

Going viral on Facebook:

Most men will receive their first bunch of flowers at their funeral.

Shared recently on YouTube:

The end of Twitter is taking forever. Did Tolkien write this?

Going viral on Instagram:

Why put off until tomorrow what you can have an intern do today?

Making waves on Messenger:

Signed an Executive Order that you have to give me a little forehead kiss.

Just landed via Slack:

Mashed potatoes are just German guacamole.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Imagine hating me and im just at my desk spinning reeaaally fast in my office chair.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

People keep inviting me to stuff. I miss the pandemic.

The fewer friends at your birthday party means more cake for you. Follow me for more life hacks.

I get so flattered when butterflies or bees buzz around me. Like, sorry ladies, I’m not a flower, but it’s so sweet that you thought I was. Hehe.

Oh, sorry, I can’t right now. I’m imagining some things and worrying about them.

Every Microsoft Teams invite you get lowers your testosterone by 1-2%

Instead of working on making myself a better person, I am going to purchase a cool new jacket.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨