Money doesn’t impress me. Giving it to me does.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has shared:

If anyone is still on Facebook, please check on my parents.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has bookmarked:

Marriage is 33.3% hiding to eat snacks because you and your spouse are supposed to be on a diet.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has downloaded:

I need a weighted blanket that won’t let me get out of bed in the morning.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has downloaded:

Sometimes I look deep into my colleagues’ eyes to check if you really can’t see the back of their skulls.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has shared:

Not to brag but I gave someone directions and he made it.

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Everyone you know is fighting battles you don’t know about, except for my neighbor who just can not shut up about his battles.

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“How is the job search going?” First of all, that is a violent question. And it hurts me, by the way. And second, how the hell should I know.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has bookmarked:

A Jackie Chan fight scene where he’s in an IKEA warehouse and he fights off dudes with furniture pieces, but by the end he’s accidentally assembled it all into a complete Malm bedroom set.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has viewed:

“Nothing beats in-person interaction”. Yeah, with someone I know and love, not Denise from finance.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has bookmarked:

Finally it’s Friday and I can go out. I’m putting the garbage out and I’ll be right back.