Wordgag 🎅

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇸 has shared:

I think it’s sad that getting married is one of the only ways to guarantee somebody will be forced to make a speech about how great you are.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has downloaded:

I become someone I don’t recognize when I play Monopoly.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has viewed:

Goodnight to the men who know one woman is enough. The rest can get sleep paralysis.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has downloaded:

Probably the worst thing about pyramid schemes is how they make you advertise to all your friends and family that you are part of a pyramid scheme.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has bookmarked:

It’s almost time to put winter tires on the struggle bus.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has downloaded:

We need a holiday at the end of every summer that honours all the women who wore sundresses.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has downloaded:

You want me to sit in the back seat? The thing that killed JFK?

Someone from 🇺🇦 has copied:

He died doing what he loved: trying to find out if gang members are ticklish.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has viewed:

I only like when it rains when I’m home.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has copied:

Would pay $10 a month for Summer Premium Package without wasps.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

508 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,101

Funny Quotes Topics

17,252

Funny Quotes Images

15,101

Updated

Dec 23, 2025

Users Online

3,787

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

Having leftover pizza for breakfast is an actual blessing.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

I’m still waiting for the day my parents will say, “It’s all fake, we are millionaires, this was just to teach you to be humble”.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Men be like: I would love the opportunity to give you the bare minimum.

Spotted on YouTube:

My cat, who has no job and pays no rent, is apparently unhappy with his fancy new cat food, and I, for some reason, am currently on my way back to the store to rectify the matter.

Going viral on X:

Getting a random boner is a bit funny. Like, what is it, boy? What do you see?

Seen just now on WeChat:

If dogs ever learn to talk, I want everyone to keep in mind that mine is a big fat liar.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

I deliberately don’t go to bed early. I don’t want to look like I could be useful for anything the next day.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Gonna mess with my husband by texting “send nudes” when he’s in a work meeting.

Seen just now on Slack:

The sexual tension between me and a late afternoon coffee to get me through the workday.

Just landed via Reddit:

Pursuing an academic career is like thinking the stripper loves you.

My company promotes diversity. We’d never hire twins.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Sorry twins, you'll have to take turns applying at this company! We're all about unique individuals here 😉👯‍♂️ #NoTwinningAllowed"

company, diversity, hire, humor, never, twins, workplace

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Your life can’t fall apart if you never had it together.

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apart, fall, fall apart, humor, irony, life, perspective, reality, self-awareness, together
Good news, I just decided I don’t care about anything anymore.

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5 months ago

anything, apathy, attitude, care, decision, good, humor, i, indifference, just, news, sarcasm
Spoiler alert: Monday doesn’t care about your feelings.

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Living up to your potential sounds exhausting.

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exhausting, expectations, humor, living, motivation, potential, reality, self-improvement, sounds
Some people are living proof that brain failure does not immediately lead to death.

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brain, brain failure, comedy, death, failure, humor, irony, lead, life, living, people, proof
The gap in my resume is because I was trying to reach enlightenment for 5 years.

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1 month ago

5, break, career, career break, enlightenment, gap, humor, i, job, job gap, meditation, reach, resume, resume gap, self-improvement, trying

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

17 shares on YouTube this month:

Robert De Niro always looks like he just smelled a nasty fart.

22 shares on Pinterest this month:

Free will: where you get to choose your own adventure … and regret it.

23 shares on Slack this month:

Ah yes, my abandonment issues due to all the abandonment.

98 shares on Facebook this month:

The best part of the relationship is before you meet them, and you’re single.

79 shares on X this month:

No offense, fellas, we love compliments, but a compliment from another woman means just a little bit more.

73 shares on Messenger this month:

Let’s call it a year. I’ve had enough. Merry Christmas, y’all.

48 shares on Discord this month:

Rich people don’t put their couches against their wall. I moved my couch into the middle of the floor and still haven’t gotten rich. I don’t know what I’m doing wrong here.

10 shares on TikTok this month:

Spiders are the only web developers who love finding bugs.

34 shares on Facebook this month:

God bless the student essay that is so confused and rambling, there is zero chance that they used AI.

35 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Potato chips ARE vegetables! I exclaim as I tear open the third bag.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇽 has downloaded:

All I’m saying is that big burgers should be wider not taller.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has viewed:

“I asked ChatGPT,” “I asked Grok,” yeah, well, I wipe away the hours conversing with the flowers.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has copied:

Don’t listen to any thoughts about yourself if your hair isn’t washed. It’s just not true.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has shared:

Y’all ever skip a class and then have the post-skip class depression? Like, damn, I should’ve just gone.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has copied:

Gonna spend today following my cats into the kitchen and meowing at them until they give me treats.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has shared:

The only thing smart about you is your wisdom tooth.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has downloaded:

When my nudes go to the cloud, I always hope God is impressed.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

I hope we’re good friends until we die, then I hope we can stay ghost friends, walk through walls and scare people.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has bookmarked:

Get off the internet and go sniff a flower.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has shared:

If my neighbors would just talk a little louder I could follow along with their conversation, but no. Rude.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via TikTok:

I hope my email finds you enraged.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Very disappointed by the symbolism of last night’s dream. Just really obvious, derivative stuff.

Making waves on Slack:

Why are fish the only thing you can monger? Let me monger some other stuff.

Breaking via Snapchat:

I need to social distance with the refrigerator so I can flatten my curve.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

I know which nation I like best. Hibernation.

Just landed via Discord:

Worst feeling in the world is when you are loyal to all your girlfriends but your favorite one is cheating on you.

Just landed via Telegram:

There’s something so spiritual about new life. When I look my baby nephew in the eyes, I can’t stop thinking about how amazing it will be to connect with him on LinkedIn.

Making waves on Twitch:

Commenting “humiliation ritual” on a pic of my friend out with his family.

Spotted on Telegram:

I’m going to start walking around in my yard all day in a bathrobe so my neighbors will build that privacy fence I always wanted.

Shared recently on Threads:

Fries, not lies.

Wordgag 🎅

Activity Log ✨

My company promotes diversity. We’d never hire twins.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Your life can’t fall apart if you never had it together.

Good news, I just decided I don’t care about anything anymore.

Spoiler alert: Monday doesn’t care about your feelings.

Living up to your potential sounds exhausting.

Some people are living proof that brain failure does not immediately lead to death.

The gap in my resume is because I was trying to reach enlightenment for 5 years.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨