Commentary:
So true! But I'd still need a data center to Google how to find clean water! 💧🤔💻
472 Funny never quotes
The Odyssey is proof that “on my way” has never meant “be there soon.”
Commentary:
Odysseus' definition of "on my way" clearly involved detours, giants, and a decade-long traffic jam 😂🗺️⏳
Why is there never an outbreak of something nice?
Commentary:
Finally! Waiting for that chocolate outbreak—immunity ready 🍫😄
I wouldn’t know if the stripper loves me. I’ve never been to a strip club. I mostly go to Lidl or Aldi.
Commentary:
Looks like you're more into discount deals than dollar bills! 🛒💰😂
Parents’ phones make notification sounds I’ve never heard in my life.
Commentary:
When parents' phones beep, I half expect to hear an old-timey radio announcer say, "Stay tuned for the latest weather report!" 📻😂
I have never fully recovered from the fact that I exist.
Commentary:
Still trying to get a refund on my existence subscription 😅🤔✨
I will never understand why every patient takes almost an hour with the doctor, but when I go in, I’m out in less than five minutes.
Commentary:
Guess I'm just too healthy for their liking! 🤷♂️🏥😂
Never underestimate the ability of ice cream to make you feel better when you’re having a bad day as an adult.
Commentary:
Why go to therapy when you can just grab a pint? 🍦🛋️😄
You take a week or two away from working out, and your body acts like it’s never done a run or lifted a weight before.
Commentary:
My muscles are like, "Exercise? I don't know her!" 🏋️♂️🤷♂️😂
Sometimes you’re eating a salad, and it feels like it’s never going to end.
Commentary:
When your salad feels like it's auditioning for the role of Neverending Gobstopper. 🥗😂