Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
Looks like someone's got the recipe for a botastic milkshake! 🤖🥤 Just remember, be careful not to overload the yard with too many bots – you don't want them to start a dance-off over who has the best circuits! 💃🤖🕺

attraction, bot, bring, culture, drink, humor, milkshake, pop, pop culture, reference, yard

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

If camera lenses are round, why are the pictures square?

0

2 months ago

camera, humor, lens, photography, picture, pictures, round, square
I’m always in a rush to go home, and do absolutely nothing.

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2 months ago

always, do nothing, home, humor, nothing, procrastination, relaxation, rush
My life started becoming a mess when I was put in charge of my own bedtime.

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2 months ago

bedtime, charge, humor, i, life, mess, own, put, responsibility, self-control
I don’t “make friends”. I get adopted by extroverts and they make me do things.

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2 months ago

activitie, adoption, extrovert, friendship, fun, introvert, me, socializing, things
Both my wife and my doctor said no more jumping on the bed. But they don’t get it. They don’t know what it’s like to live with the Monkey Instinct.

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2 months ago

advice, bed, behavior, both, doctor, family, health, health advice, humor, instinct, jumping, jumping on the bed, know, live, monkey, monkey instinct, playful, playful behavior, said, wife
Imagine hating me and I’m just over here doing an epic air-drum solo to ‘In The Air Tonight’.

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2 months ago

air, air-drum, confidence, doing, epic, fun, hate, here, humor, imagine, just, me, music, over, performance, solo, tonight

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

63 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I know life can be tough, but you still gotta wear deodorant.

94 shares on Threads this month:

I haven’t had sex in so long, I forgot how to moan, what if I mess up and bark?

10 shares on Telegram this month:

I can’t believe that it’s our turn to give money to our nephews and nieces.

12 shares on Twitch this month:

Home is where the Wi-Fi connects automatically and no one chews loud.

41 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’ve jogged with my jogging pants about as often as I’ve rolled through the kitchen with kitchen roll.

60 shares on Instagram this month:

If chickens knew how good they tasted, they would understand.

23 shares on Messenger this month:

If the earth is so flat, explain why cats haven’t pushed everything off it yet. You can’t.

53 shares on Slack this month:

“I’ve never met a medical receptionist that I believed wanted me to live.”

92 shares on Discord this month:

Our house is so messy that if we ever disappeared, the police would have no idea if there were “signs of a struggle”.

14 shares on YouTube this month:

Women’s skincare is so confusing. Am I supposed to look shiny and sweaty, or matte like cement?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇴 has bookmarked:

Today I learned that up to half of the worker ants in a colony are only pretending to work, just looking busy so they don’t get tasked with anything. I respect ants so much more.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

Fyi, if you like listening to “rain sounds,” they’re almost all recordings of chicken being fried.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has viewed:

It took three employees to help me complete “self-checkout” yesterday.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has downloaded:

My future husband is probably enjoying a nice summer with his first wife… but the seeds of discontent are there.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has bookmarked:

My hobbies include saying, “I’m so tired,” and then staying up for three more hours doing nothing.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has shared:

Crazy that caffeine has no short or long-term negative side effects. Just a super drug from God.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has shared:

I am the first person in my bloodline to attempt to become hot, and I can feel my genes fighting me every step of the way.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has copied:

Accidentally used my real personality at work today… heading to HR now.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has shared:

Heartbreaking: Introvert sentenced to 100 hours of hanging out.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has shared:

I taped a picture of my paycheck on my front door to keep all the solicitors away.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Facebook:

Doggy style is out cat style is in. It’s where I let you touch me until I’m satisfied then ignore you and scratch you if you try and touch me again.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

The internet is fun because you can post about mayonnaise and somehow end up in a fight.

Breaking via Reddit:

I went downstairs to get my charger. I came back up with a bowl of ice cream and no charger.

Live now on Pinterest:

If you ever ask a teen to do something and they just say “sure” without arguing, check that they haven’t been replaced with an android.

Going viral on Twitch:

The best part about NYC is you literally see a brand new, hottest woman in your entire life every single day.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

If the first thing you do in the morning is checking your emails, you’re starting your day with other people’s problems.

Going bananas on Reddit:

We need a true crime show called Downtown Stabby.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

It’s Friday. I ran out of small talk on Tuesday. Please leave me alone.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

So I used to wonder about people that paid a fortune for those little bottles of Evian water, until I read it backwards.

Breaking via Facebook:

I apologize to my future son for the delay, but it’s just your mom ain’t replying.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

My milkshakes bring all the bots to the yard.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

If camera lenses are round, why are the pictures square?

I’m always in a rush to go home, and do absolutely nothing.

My life started becoming a mess when I was put in charge of my own bedtime.

I don’t “make friends”. I get adopted by extroverts and they make me do things.

Both my wife and my doctor said no more jumping on the bed. But they don’t get it. They don’t know what it’s like to live with the Monkey Instinct.

Imagine hating me and I’m just over here doing an epic air-drum solo to ‘In The Air Tonight’.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨