Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
🤑 Don't worry about empty pockets when you can just lighten your desires! 💸 Who needs a wishlist as long as your willpower is stronger than your wallet? 😜 Remember, the less you crave, the more you save! 💰 #ShoppingGoals

able, being, buy, happiness, irony, much, not wanting, secret, simplicity, want, wanting, whatever

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

My husband pissed me off so I wrapped his remote and put it under the tree.

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2 months ago

frustration, gift, holiday, humor, husband, i, marriage, me, pissed, prank, put, remote, tree, under
That odd feeling when your lunch break is over and you still have to work for another 30 years.

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2 months ago

30, another, break, feeling, lunch, odd, over, still, work, year’s
Sunday is my favorite day where I pretend I’m going to do something productive.

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2 months ago

day, favorite, favorite day, going, humor, i, pretend, procrastination, productive, relaxation, something, Sunday, where
Not to brag, but I’ve seen Barbie naked.

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2 months ago

Barbie, brag, childhood, doll, humor, naked, playtime, toy
Potatoes make French fries, chips and vodka. It’s like the other vegetables aren’t even trying.

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2 months ago

alcohol, chips, french fries, vegetable, vodka
Having children is like living in a frat house – nobody sleeps, everything’s broken, and there’s a lot of throwing up.

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2 months ago

broken, chaos, children, frat, frat house, house, humor, living, parenting, sleep, throwing, throwing up

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

54 shares on Instagram this month:

Once your parents move from “What time are you coming back” to “Are you coming back today,” you have won the war.

75 shares on Reddit this month:

Fact: Snow in November happens because people decorate for Christmas prematurely. You know who you are. Stop it.

95 shares on WhatsApp this month:

In your 20s and 30s, you’ll start rediscovering the niche interests and hobbies you had as a kid. It’s very important you revisit them. Your younger self was actually on to something.

41 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Wow, another wooden ball. Would it kill avocado makers to put a different toy in there?

18 shares on Threads this month:

“You never reply to messages.” I am just one person, okay? I am understaffed.

73 shares on Threads this month:

The easiest way to bundle your home and auto insurance is to live in your car.

74 shares on X this month:

The toughest part of a diet isn’t watching what you eat. It’s watching what other people eat.

33 shares on Slack this month:

I was not meant to work a job; I was meant to lay down and ponder.

47 shares on Discord this month:

“I should’ve peed before I left,” will be my epitaph.

72 shares on Facebook this month:

We go together like coffee and cigarettes.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

Please solve a murder to prove you’re not a bot.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has downloaded:

How old is older? Because I’m still waiting for this wise thing to kick in.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has downloaded:

Capri Sun tastes as if scientists had bet that they could make fruit juice without fruit.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has shared:

“Thanks for your payment!” Shut up. I paid that bill against my will.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has copied:

Statistically speaking, on average, a person has two arms, two legs, one testicle, and one ovary.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has bookmarked:

The year I was born, getting a little far on that little scrolly thing.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has copied:

No revenge, but I hope you stutter every time you try to dirty talk with someone.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has viewed:

I didn’t just turn into a grouchy old woman overnight. It took years of people letting me down, pissing me off, and dealing with idiots to get this good at it.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has copied:

One day you’re young and carefree and the next, you’re preheating the bathroom before you go in for a shower.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

Excuse me sir, are you going to finish that existential crisis?

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Facebook:

I swear, one more minor inconvenience and I’m running away to join the circus.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

It should be illegal to take a nap and still have a headache when you wake up. Like, no, I shut it off and back on again. Why are you still here?

Live now on LinkedIn:

Just realized John the Baptist and Winnie the Pooh have the same middle name.

Spotted on Discord:

I’m at the age where the first thing I do when I get somewhere is look for a place to sit.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

The secret to being able to buy whatever you want is not wanting much.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

My husband pissed me off so I wrapped his remote and put it under the tree.

That odd feeling when your lunch break is over and you still have to work for another 30 years.

Sunday is my favorite day where I pretend I’m going to do something productive.

Not to brag, but I’ve seen Barbie naked.

Potatoes make French fries, chips and vodka. It’s like the other vegetables aren’t even trying.

Having children is like living in a frat house – nobody sleeps, everything’s broken, and there’s a lot of throwing up.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨