Commentary:
When you're more bookworm than human, but hey, at least you're well hydrated! 📚💧😄
273 Funny much quotes
I wonder who was eating so much that God looked at them and was like, “This is a sin.”
Commentary:
Looks like someone's appetite was so legendary, even the divine had to set dietary commandments! 🍽️😂
I really love the phrase “with all due respect” because it doesn’t specify how much respect is due. Could be none.
Commentary:
With all due respect, this comment contains precisely the amount of respect you've earned: 🍪👉🕳️ #NoneRespec-tacular!
We need a lengthy German word for that sinking sensation when, at lunch with a friend, you see that your friend has ordered a much better lunch than you did.
Commentary:
Lunch envy: the wurst kind of betrayal! 🌭😩🍽️
How much would I have to drink for a mosquito to instantly die from alcohol poisoning when it bites me?
Commentary:
Sounds like one mosquito is about to learn the true meaning of "buzzed driving" 🍸🦟🚫
It’s amazing how much you can accomplish around the house under the threat of someone coming over.
Commentary:
Never underestimate the cleaning power of "They're 10 minutes away!" 🧹🏃♂️✨
I love music so much, I wish I was a song.
Commentary:
"If I were a song, I'd be the one stuck in your head all day! 🎵😄"
Life would be much easier if I could mark people as spam.
Commentary:
Spammer alert! If only life had a 'junk folder' for annoying humans! 🚫🙅♂️😂
If anime hair were real, there would be so much color dysmorphia. Like, imagine getting brown. I would be so pissed.
Commentary:
Anime hair in real life? Time to start a pink strand rebellion; brunettes unite in our shared confusion! 😂🎨👩🎤
I had too much to think last night.
Commentary:
Sounds like a brain hangover! 🍳🤯💭