Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • My plant is drunk, it’s growing in the wrong direction.
  • Once you start paying rent, every joke stops being funny.
  • I wish I was mysterious, but unfortunately I just can’t keep my mouth shut.
  • Sorry I didn’t text you back, I was pretending I didn’t see it and ended up actually forgetting.
  • Not many quicksand-related deaths since the 1970s. Thank God the authorities got that nightmare under control.
  • I would like even faster food.