Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇦 has viewed:

Real introverts are too introverted to tell people they’re introverts.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has copied:

If you see me out in public but we haven’t talked since high school, let’s keep it that way.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has copied:

I need to hire someone to just constantly slap food out of my hand.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has shared:

I did 30 minutes of chores, time for a 7-hour break.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has shared:

Everyone is either engaged, at a run club, doing their master’s, or in Japan.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has shared:

Nobody defends billionaires better than dudes making $50,000 a year.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has downloaded:

9-5 is really 10-2 if you’re working remote.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has viewed:

At what age do people actually meet up to play bingo? I’m ready.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has shared:

Did you get the telepathic message I sent earlier?

Someone from 🇧🇯 has bookmarked:

I just looked over at my new shoes and the box says “vegan”. I’ve never had to feed my other shoes before.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,273

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via X:

When I’m drafting a legal document, I’ll sprinkle the word “herein” all over that thing like it’s paprika.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

I don’t drink coffee all the time. I take breaks in between to make another one.

Shared recently on Discord:

Remember, when a package says “sharing size”, that’s just a guideline. They have no enforcement mechanism.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Therapy is life letting you speak to the manager.

Just landed via Threads:

Buying something nice for myself, cuz today would’ve been my birthday if I was born today.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

The older I get, the more I hate making extra stops after work. I drive home like I’m late for the house.

Trending via Facebook:

Gang members are so lucky to have something to do with their hands in photos.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Oxygen was discovered in 1773. How did our ancestors breathe before then?

Making waves on X:

I stay up late every night, regret it in the morning, and the next day I do it all over again.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Be the lemon you want the world to hand to others.

We need a better word for horny that sounds elegant and gorgeous.

4 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When "aflame with desire" sounds like a candle commercial 😂🔥💃

better, elegance, elegant, expression, gorgeous, horny, humor, language, need, sounds, vocabulary, word

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Candy cigarettes really used to be a thing and we really bought them and walked around like we were smokers at the tender age of 6.

0

2 months ago

age, around, candy, childhood, cigarettes, humor, innocence, memory, nostalgia, smokers, thing, used
We really do need a separate grocery store for people who’ve been on Earth before.

0

3 months ago

alien, before, Earth, grocery, grocery store, humor, joke, need, newcomer, people, shopping, store
I get at least 1,000 steps in waiting for my food to be done in the microwave.

0

2 months ago

done, exercise, food, humor, i, least, microwave, step, steps, waiting
People who cook breakfast before going to work are too mature for me.

0

2 months ago

before, breakfast, cook, cooking, going, humor, mature, maturity, me, morning, morning routine, people, routine, too, work
My only regret is not leaving people alone the first time they moved funny.

0

5 months ago

alone, behavior, Funny, funny behavior, humor, interaction, leaving, moved, only, people, regret, social, social interaction, suspicion, time, trust
I prefer my weighted blanket in human form.

0

2 months ago

blanket, comfort, form, human, human form, humor, i, preferences, relaxation, weighted, weighted blanket

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

70 shares on Telegram this month:

I really don’t get enough praise for someone who doesn’t need validation from others.

61 shares on X this month:

I really don’t believe all of these women are actually named “Sassy”

21 shares on Instagram this month:

Me: Please let me sleep! Brain: Nope, we have to stay up together and go over every bad life decision we have made so far.

61 shares on Reddit this month:

Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I’d grow up to be a weird freak.

57 shares on Telegram this month:

I briefly stepped away from social media to get an idea of what else is going on in the world. For instance, I didn’t realize I was still married.

69 shares on Messenger this month:

Be nice to me, I may be hot one day.

84 shares on Instagram this month:

Nothing you want to do has a timeline.

45 shares on Twitch this month:

“Well, this is no good. How do I turn it off?” – The first primate to experience consciousness.

80 shares on WeChat this month:

Best friends: they know how crazy you are but still choose to be seen in public with you.

96 shares on Threads this month:

A bathrobe is being naked with plausible deniability and pockets.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇩 has copied:

I can’t wait until I’m old enough to pretend I can’t hear.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

Having a job is cool, but everyday? Come on!

Someone from 🇯🇵 has viewed:

When did making sense stop making sense?

Someone from 🇦🇩 has downloaded:

I was having a great time until I remembered that I was ugly.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has shared:

Pouring rain, football on TV, empty house; the stuff dreams are made of.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has viewed:

Me: I’m an introvert. Vodka: No, you’re not.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has copied:

Babe, are you OK? It’s already Q4, and you’ve barely touched your “2025 roadmap.”

Someone from 🇯🇴 has shared:

Kid, I have jeans older than you.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has copied:

I aspire to be a stay-at-home mom with no kids.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has copied:

I just went to Crazy Town, and they said you’re a local legend.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Reddit:

Ok, I cheated in school, but I did it the hard way and without AI.

Trending via Discord:

Life hack: give yourself 8 to 12 hours of alone time in the morning to mentally prepare for the day.

Going viral on Discord:

I am like a wildflower, a quiet rebellion blooming through ruins and dust.

Going bananas on Instagram:

Why do we call it tuna fish? Is there any other tuna out there that’s not a fish?

Making waves on Messenger:

I came home to find my boyfriend mopping the floor and my first thought was, “who’d he kill?”

Live now on WhatsApp:

More candlelight, less gaslight, babe.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

There’s a Marie Antoinette feeling in the air.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

I would prefer not to.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Stop eating around the bush or whatever the saying is.

Going viral on Slack:

I’ll stop smoking weed when life stops smoking me.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

We need a better word for horny that sounds elegant and gorgeous.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Candy cigarettes really used to be a thing and we really bought them and walked around like we were smokers at the tender age of 6.

We really do need a separate grocery store for people who’ve been on Earth before.

I get at least 1,000 steps in waiting for my food to be done in the microwave.

People who cook breakfast before going to work are too mature for me.

My only regret is not leaving people alone the first time they moved funny.

I prefer my weighted blanket in human form.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨