Home Funny Quotes Welcome to adulthood. Everyone’s tired here.

Welcome to adulthood. Everyone’s tired here.

2 months ago

Commentary:
"Welcome to adulthood, where the coffee flows like water and sleep is just a distant memory. 😴☕️ Don't worry, we're all just zombies in business attire here! 💼🧟‍♂️"

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Old people get so mad when you’re young and tired.

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I love saying “why would I lie” when I’m lying.

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Once you find a pair of pants that fit you perfectly, it’s over for all your other pants.

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Now I know why my dad used to wake up at 4AM and just sit at the kitchen table for an hour.

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Men will ruin your whole life then come back and like your story.

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I keep myself humble by messing up all the time.

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Tomorrow isn’t promised, we need to flirt today.

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Is it possible to die of horniness? Asking for a friend.

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The real morning people are the ones that wake up to call radio stations.

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I assume fish have beautiful names for eachother, unpronounceable by human tongues.

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Being a woman is trying to guess what the hell is going on with your body three times a week.

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Pinterest algorithm is like a loving dad who fills the whole fridge with oranges after seeing you enjoy one.

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They need to invent a job for people who aren’t good at anything nor motivated nor social.

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The cost of living has gotten so high, I’m thinking about having a nap for dinner.

5 days ago

“Stop bouncing your leg!” It’s either this or I start screaming.

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