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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

“Autism didn’t exist until recently!” Have you met old guys who work in hardware stores?

Someone from 🇨🇫 has shared:

I love your niche references! Are you typically ignored in large groups, by any chance?

Someone from 🇹🇱 has shared:

“But it’s summer,” is going to be my excuse for everything from now until the end of September.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has downloaded:

I love when someone is like “I’m funny because I have trauma and it’s a coping mechanism” and it’s like “Okay, not to add to your trauma, but you’re not funny!”

Someone from 🇵🇾 has bookmarked:

Can we get some A.I. to pick plastic out of the ocean, or do all the robots need to be poets?

Someone from 🇩🇰 has viewed:

Nothing hurts more than someone not getting your joke.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has shared:

The phrase “don’t take this the wrong way” has a 0% success rate.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has downloaded:

Every night at bedtime I do one small ritual: six hours on my cell phone.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has copied:

I have to pee. Story of my life.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has shared:

I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

828 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,990

Funny Quotes Topics

13,934

Funny Quotes Images

10,990

23 minutes ago

3,447

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on LinkedIn:

There is too much money in the world for me to be broke.

Reported on Threads:

Weekends are getting shorter and shorter. You blink and it’s already Sunday 5pm.

Trending via Twitch:

Forget Spotify Wrapped. I’m more interested in seeing your Pornhub Wrapped.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

There are three certainties in life: death, taxes and getting stuck behind a shit driver when you’re late.

Seen just now on WeChat:

If I sing “Hello” and you think of “Lionel Richie” and not “Adele,” then you can probably predict the weather with one of your knees.

Seen just now on Telegram:

The only time you should be faking it is when your pet checks to see if you’re awake.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

I bought a bag of M&M’s and they don’t have M’s anymore. They all have W’s, for woke.

Going viral on Threads:

Aliens probably have group chats called Don’t Stop on Earth.

Spotted on Slack:

A garlic a day keeps the doctor away.

Just landed via Reddit:

I just ordered a life alert bracelet, so if I ever get a life, I’ll be notified immediately.

Welcome to your 40s, the best part of your day is now the heated seats in your car after a long day.

6 months ago

Welcome to your 40s, the best part of your day is now the heated seats in your car after a long day.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Ah, the joys of adulting in your 40s! 🚗💺 Who needs thrill rides when the highlight of your day is feeling that toasty warmth on your backside as you sink into your car's heated seats? 🌟 Here's to finding comfort in the little things as we navigate through this thing called life! 🙌 #40sPerks #SeatWarmerLuxe

40s, adulthood, after, best, best part, car, comfort, day, heated, heated seat, humor, life, life transition, long day, seat, seats, transition, welcome

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

828 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,990

Funny Quotes Topics

13,934

Funny Quotes Images

10,990

23 minutes ago

3,424

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇭 has viewed:

This meeting could have been an oil painting.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has viewed:

“Bluetooth or Insane?” is a fun game we all play when we see a lone person speaking out loud in public.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has shared:

Please solve a murder to prove you’re not a bot.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has downloaded:

Being quiet in a room full of loud people is my favorite sport.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has downloaded:

I hope you celebrate your birthday like your birth – naked and screaming.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has viewed:

I don’t drink and drive, but some people drive me to drink.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has bookmarked:

Dear people who talk on speakerphone out in public. Everyone around you hates you.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

I like running because it’s cheaper than paying for a gym membership. If the gym wants the money I owe them, they’ll have to catch me.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has bookmarked:

Breakups are hard, but have you ever been disappointed in the food you ordered?

Someone from 🇸🇾 has copied:

I hate it when my body decides to get sick. I gave you a vegetable last week, how dare you.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Instagram:

If alcohol damages your short-term memory, imagine what alcohol can do.

Going viral on Threads:

I love how this generation broke the previous misconception that “people with tattoos can’t get good jobs” and now we all agree that “people with and without tattoos can’t get good jobs”.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

I always cook with wine. Sometimes I even add it to the food.

Just landed via TikTok:

Experts say that human interaction is important for brain health but I’m willing to risk it.

Going viral on X:

Can I get back all those naps I refused to take as a kid? I could really use them now.

Just shared via YouTube:

The closest thing I’ve had to a personal trainer is the ice cream truck that drove past my house.

Shared recently on Messenger:

If you’re ever wondering what to do in an uncomfortable situation, just think “What would teenage me do?” And then do the opposite of that.

Spotted on Reddit:

When I was a little girl, I always dreamed of growing up to satisfy user needs in a way that meets business goals for transformative outcomes.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

I suck at flirting. I’ll be like “is that so?”

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Only a couple more days until I come home and pretend I forgot about Valentine’s Day.

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