Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Ah, the ol' 'I'm not ignoring the rules, I just didn't notice you, Officer' defense 🚓😅 It's all fun and games until you get caught… and end up with a ticket souven-WHEEEE! 🚗💨"

car, driving, excuse, humor, i, joke, just, limit, officer, speed, speed limit, traffic, yes

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

My back and I are definitely not the same age.

0

2 months ago

age, back, body, getting, getting older, humor, i, older, perspective, same, self-deprecation
Taking the day off to brush up on conspiracy theories and really get this family party started.

0

2 months ago

activity, brush, conspiracy, conspiracy theory, day, day off, family, family party, fun, fun activity, humor, leisure, leisure time, party, relaxation, theory, time
I wish I loved exercise as much as I love napping 3 times a day and eating 5 times the suggested serving size.

0

2 months ago

day, eating, exercise, fitness, humor, i, laziness, love, napping, rest, serving, serving size, size, snack, times, wish
Everything is awful, and no one is going to save you from this treacherous world. Oops, I mean, happy Friday!

0

2 months ago

awful, contrast, dark, dark humor, everything, Friday, going, happy, humor, i, irony, mean, mood, oops, pessimism, positivity, sarcasm, save, world
My cat just knocked over my coffee mug and looked at me like it was my fault. How dare I put it on the edge of the table?

0

2 months ago

attitude, behavior, blame, cat, coffee, coffee mug, dare, domestic, domestic life, edge, fault, feline, feline attitude, humor, i, just, kitchen, life, me, mischief, mug, over, pet, pet behavior, put, table
Guys, stop showering. I need the water for ChatGPT.

0

1 month ago

ChatGPT, conservation, guys, humor, i, joke, need, shower, stop, technology, water, water conservation

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

92 shares on Facebook this month:

Sorry I’m late, I was fighting for my right to party.

39 shares on Messenger this month:

Brave of you to assume you can resist my good looks.

56 shares on Snapchat this month:

Have you ever pretended not to look at the biscuits or sweets being handed around the room, and acted surprised when you got offered one?

98 shares on Twitch this month:

Maybe coffee is addicted to me?

84 shares on Threads this month:

Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you, but not in the one ahead.

77 shares on Pinterest this month:

Sometimes there is no way to debug besides staring at the code until you become enlightened.

83 shares on Telegram this month:

My hobbies include using the TV as background noise while I scroll on my phone.

20 shares on Slack this month:

Had salad for the third night in a row and now I get why you’re so angry, vegans.

35 shares on Instagram this month:

Your boos don’t mean anything to me. I’ve seen what you people cheer for!

80 shares on Twitch this month:

Don’t forget to overestimate your importance today.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇦 has downloaded:

Welcome to your 50s, where coffee is the new happy hour and mornings are the new hangover.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has downloaded:

A haunted house, but it’s just a room full of people asking you to tell them a fun fact about yourself.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has downloaded:

I find as I get older it’s the little things that bring me joy. Like embarrassing my children.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has copied:

If anime hair were real, there would be so much color dysmorphia. Like, imagine getting brown. I would be so pissed.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has copied:

My ducks: in a row. My elephant: addressed. My eggs: several baskets. My bigger fish: fried.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has bookmarked:

I don’t want your hoodie, I want your still-beating heart presented to me in a box.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

My phone is on Do Not Disturb because I am disturbed enough as it is.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has bookmarked:

Just told my cat I’d give her 500 bucks to stop meowing.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has downloaded:

Our childhood photos might be ugly but those smiles were definitely not fake.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has viewed:

I just lost all my tabs. Only now do I understand the tragedy that was the burning of the Library of Alexandria.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

All my passwords are protected, by my poor memory.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Women don’t like me, so I’m going to spend all my money on a jacket.

Trending via Messenger:

Guy smoking weed daily: “I think smoking weed in moderation is fine.”

Trending via Telegram:

I don’t know what’s more fun—grocery shopping or making the old men blush by asking if these melons look ripe.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Spring is what we call the time in between complaining about the cold and complaining about the heat.

Live now on Telegram:

My fondest childhood memory is being able to sleep through the entire night and waking up rested.

Trending via Instagram:

“You look happy.” Thanks, I stopped dating.

Seen just now on Instagram:

What’s a polite way to tell someone you hope they get mauled by a bear?

Seen just now on TikTok:

Having a crush is so stupid. Like, why is this dude in my head at 8 am?

Just shared via Telegram:

Jeans have the tendency of looking neat when you’re about to wash them.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Yes, officer I saw the speed limit, I just didn’t see your car.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

My back and I are definitely not the same age.

Taking the day off to brush up on conspiracy theories and really get this family party started.

I wish I loved exercise as much as I love napping 3 times a day and eating 5 times the suggested serving size.

Everything is awful, and no one is going to save you from this treacherous world. Oops, I mean, happy Friday!

My cat just knocked over my coffee mug and looked at me like it was my fault. How dare I put it on the edge of the table?

Guys, stop showering. I need the water for ChatGPT.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨