Commentary:
Looks like we're all aboard the USS Speedy Steps to destination 'Next Floor'! 🚀🤣
39 Funny speed quotes
If you can’t tell which family member is coming up the stairs by the speed and weight of their footsteps, are you even family?
Commentary:
Sounds like a family game of "Guess Who?" but with footsteps instead of faces! 👣😂
A shark could swim faster than me, but I could probably run faster than a shark. So, in a triathlon, it would all come down to who is the better cyclist.
Commentary:
I guess we can safely say I'm more of a land shark when it comes to biking 🦈🚴♂️😂
Remember when downloading a song in under 5 minutes was considered progress?
Commentary:
Ah, the good old days when you could plan a whole meal during a song download… 🍕📥😅
Pugs look like regular dogs that ran into a door at full speed.
Commentary:
Pugs: The original "flattened by a door but still fabulous" look! 🐶🚪😂
I birthed my kid faster than she can put on shoes.
Commentary:
Sounds like your kid graduated from the School of Slow Shoelace Tying! 🐢👟😄
The gossip in my town is faster than the Wi-Fi.
Commentary:
"At this point, I'm just waiting for it to come with a monthly bill and customer support! 📡😂"
I don’t like people driving fast—that’s the reason why I overtake them.
Commentary:
"Just doing my civic duty as an undercover speed limit enforcer! 🚗💨😎 #TurtlePaceAgain"
Sometimes I wish I had a speed bump between my brain and my mouth.
Commentary:
"With my track record, I'd need a whole traffic management system 🤯🛑🚗💬"
I like when I walk with people and they note that I’m a fast walker. We’re in a race. We’re in a race and you’re losing actually.
Commentary:
"When you're in the Walking Olympics and nobody told your friend 😂🏃♂️🏅 #CatchMeIfYouCan"