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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇲 has copied:

I’m nearly qualified to be a weaver. My final exam is looming.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has viewed:

Imagine the sound a centipede would make if they wore tiny flip flops.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has copied:

Trying to watch a superhero movie without stressing about the infrastructure damage to the city.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

This year for Thanksgiving, I’ll probably bring what I brought last year… shame upon the family.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has downloaded:

Don’t date coworkers. Being the hot coworker nobody at work has a chance with is always the best role to play.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has bookmarked:

Dr. Pepper just unseated Pepsi as the second most popular soda in America. Don’t tell me that getting your PhD isn’t worth it.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has bookmarked:

You should be allowed to leave work early if you are really in love.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

Sometimes you show up to work, and they just torture you for hours.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has downloaded:

If by ‘leg day’ you mean a day that we put your legs on my shoulders, then yes, I love leg day.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has shared:

You should be allowed to call out of work if you have a really bad nightmare.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Dec 27, 2025

3,850

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Messenger:

Picking up a hitchhiker is not worth the risk of being forced to make small talk with a stranger.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Therapy? I have Spotify.

Shared recently on X:

The history of mankind would have been completely different if Adam and Eve had been Chinese. They would have left the apple hanging and eaten the snake.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Nothing tests your patience like a group chat blowing up your phone.

Broadcasted on X:

Being on Twitter right now is like playing the violin on the Titanic, except we are also making fun of the iceberg and the iceberg is getting genuinely mad.

Breaking via Twitch:

Making friends as an adult is wild because there’s so much lore to catch up on. You’ll be 3 years in and still get random drops like, ‘Oh, by the way, I used to be married.’

Broadcasted on Twitch:

What must a pancake think when it’s being flipped? Doubtless something jolly.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Just got some minutes of cardio trying to pick up an ice cube from the kitchen floor.

Live now on YouTube:

Sorry I’m late, I was fighting for my right to party.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

It’s perfectly normal if you want to watch an actor’s entire filmography because you find them attractive. Don’t let anyone stop you.

You gotta ask people nowadays, are you single single, mad at your partner single, blocked single or single just in your head.

2 months ago

0

You gotta ask people nowadays, are you single single, mad at your partner single, blocked single or single just in your head.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Navigating the world of relationships these days is like trying to solve a riddle 🤔 Are they single single, with a side of drama single, social media blocking single, or just playing mind games single? It's a modern dating mystery, folks! 🕵️‍♀️💔 #RelationshipStatusWoes

ask, blocked, dating, head, humor, just, mad, partner, people, relationships, single

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Movie date at my house, but we use pirated sites and spend all night closing pop-ups.

0

2 months ago

closing, date, entertainment, home, house, humor, internet, movie, movie date, night, pirated, pirated site, pop-up, site, sites, spend, streaming, technology
No one lies more than a parent who says, “We’ll see.” You know we’re not seeing anything.

0

2 months ago

anything, family, humor, know, lie, parent, promise, sarcasm, seeing, well
Bruce Lee had a faster older brother named Sudden Lee.

0

2 months ago

arts, brother, bruce, Bruce Lee, comedy, faster, humor, joke, lee, martial, martial arts, older, speed, sudden, Sudden Lee, wordplay
We need a true crime show called Downtown Stabby.

0

2 months ago

comedy, crime, downtown, Downtown Stabby, humor, need, satire, show, stabby, television, true, true crime
You can talk about any topic for 30 mins if you’re a confident liar.

0

2 months ago

30, communication, confidence, conversation, exaggeration, humor, liar, lying, talk, topic, wit
Horror movies should add bloopers, so after watching the main film, you’ll be able to sleep.

0

5 months ago

able, add, after, blooper, bloopers, comedy, film, horror, horror movie, joke, main, movie, scare, should, sleep, watching

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Social Media Stars ⭐

88 shares on Reddit this month:

You ever killed your own vibe by remembering?

72 shares on Telegram this month:

Imagine being social on social media.

80 shares on Twitch this month:

Somewhere there’s a girl ignoring 15 guys for a guy who gives her no attention.

29 shares on TikTok this month:

I am on my second week of biweekly pay so today I will be showing you how to make a quesadilla out of paper towels.

44 shares on Reddit this month:

Requesting the Pink Panther theme song at karaoke and just standing on the stage motionless the entire time.

84 shares on X this month:

I told my wife the laundry on the couch ain’t gonna fold itself, so if y’all don’t hear from me later, she probably folded me like an omelet.

30 shares on Slack this month:

I think we all need to go out into an empty field and just scream for about an hour.

28 shares on Discord this month:

Homeless man just called me a “loser,” and I showed him my house keys.

41 shares on Slack this month:

Are you a software update, because not now!

40 shares on TikTok this month:

Sunrises are really beautiful, but the timing is rather bad.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Not sure who needs to hear this, but make your bloody bed.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Oh my God, “unc” means uncool. I thought it meant uncle. Like you’re carrying the energy of someone’s weird uncle.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Babe, are you OK? You’ve barely fulfilled the prophecy.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

According to my calculations, we’re all screwed.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

The man who invented the Ferris wheel never met the man who invented the merry-go-round. They traveled in different circles.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m sorry, but when you call me ‘batshit crazy’ it’s almost starting to sound like you think it’s a bad thing!

18 folks are currently checking 👀

When a documentary starts with an old person going, ‘We’re a small town, we didn’t lock our doors at night,’ oh, we’re gonna find out what made them start.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry I marked myself as safe on Facebook after your PowerPoint presentation.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

It doesn’t matter how old you get, buying snacks for a road trip should always look like an unsupervised 9-year-old was given $100.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Having a cat is like having a roommate that doesn’t want to hang out and never intends on being friends.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Updated

Dec 27, 2025

Users Online

3,702

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇱 has copied:

Nobody says, ‘Bless you,’ when you fart.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has bookmarked:

At this point, the only thing that can heal me is memory loss.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has bookmarked:

Not working on myself because I make better content this way.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has bookmarked:

In general, I like company, but not when I am with my pizza.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has viewed:

I’ve never completed a marathon, but I’ve listened to my mom tell a story, so don’t talk to me about endurance.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has copied:

I’m actually really good looking if you don’t look at me.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has bookmarked:

I’m writing a book. I’ve got the page numbers done.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has downloaded:

My worst fear is looking out my window at night, and someone looking right at me.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has viewed:

That’s me in the corner, that’s me using Microsoft Word, losing my revision.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

I’m going to be real with you. My dinners lately are just sort of me throwing things into a pot like a witch in a cartoon.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via YouTube:

It’s only 9am and I’ve already ruined my son’s entire life by giving him the banana with the brown spot on it.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

Do you ever cycle through the same 4 apps on your phone over and over again, and feel like a tiger pacing its cage at the zoo?

Making waves on YouTube:

“I’m giving my daughter a male name, ain’t nobody cracking an Abdul.”

Seen just now on Slack:

Someone you haven’t talked to in forever will show up in your dream just to do a backflip.

Breaking via WeChat:

Nobody plays better together than siblings being told it’s bedtime.

Breaking via Messenger:

It’s Monday, but at what cost?

Trending via WhatsApp:

I need carpenters to remember that beds are also for sex. The aesthetics are great and all, but what is with all the squeaking?

Just landed via Discord:

I’m intermittent fasting, so I have to finish this cake really quick before 6 pm.

Seen just now on Threads:

Sorry I missed your call, I was staring in horror at the screen, wondering why on earth you couldn’t just text me.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Three out of five times, my intuition is right. Not in casinos, though.

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