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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

Movie date at my house, but we use pirated sites and spend all night closing pop-ups.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has copied:

Called in, “I put the lime in the coconut and drank it all up.”

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

I need you to put the fun in refund!

Someone from 🇰🇮 has downloaded:

Don’t suffer in silence. Make it everyone’s problem.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has downloaded:

Guys with grey in their beards will do that thing you like.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has bookmarked:

I think I just hit a Labubu with my car.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

I deserve a love so pure that my nervous system can finally rest.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has downloaded:

I wonder what the other me’s are up to in other dimensions.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has viewed:

I’m old enough to remember when regular websites were usable.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has copied:

Sometimes being a woman is just trying to figure out if you’re hormonally sad, seasonally sad, or genuinely falling apart.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

301 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,570

Funny Quotes Topics

17,628

Funny Quotes Images

15,570

Updated

Jan 12, 2026

Users Online

3,459

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Threads:

You get to choose which path you take. I see some of you have chosen the psychopath.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

“Unc” is short for “unclear.” It’s unclear what it means. “Uncle” is short for “unclear” as well.

Shared recently on Telegram:

I need an Apple Watch that tracks when my patience runs out.

Breaking via Twitch:

Going “Omgg, that’s crazy,” every time my coworkers talk until it’s time to go home.

Trending via WeChat:

I just tried to poach an egg and I now understand why Eggs Benedict is $23

Seen just now on Telegram:

I went to a mind reader. She almost went mad.

Trending via Pinterest:

I can’t believe bedtime used to be a punishment.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Humidity is great because then people think it’s not my fault that my hair looks like this.

Just shared via TikTok:

Instead of getting married again, I’m going to find a woman I don’t like and give her a house.

Going bananas on Twitch:

My new phone is being delivered by Amazon, which means that I can track its movements for a day before it tracks mine for five years.

“You just want an easy life.” Should I want a difficult one?

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Why break a sweat when life's handing out hammocks? 😎🛌✨

challenge, choice, difficult, difficult life, easy, easy life, humor, i, just, life, life philosophy, philosophy, should, simplicity, want

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

You should introduce your upper lip to your bottom lip sometime and shut up.

2 months ago

advice, bottom, conversation, humor, introduce, introduction, lip, should, shut, shut up, upper
Authenticity is whispered, but bullshit is broadcasted.

2 months ago

authenticity, broadcast, bullshit, communication, honesty, irony, whisper
Preparing for the apocalypse by becoming fluent in zombie.

3 months ago

apocalypse, fluency, humor, language, preparation, survival, zombie
Did the people you had a crush on always like you back or are you funny?

2 months ago

always, back, crush, humor, people, relationships
You know it’s bad when people start telling you, you are the strongest person they’ve ever met.

3 months ago

bad, compliment, encouragement, ever, humor, interaction, irony, know, met, people, person, resilience, social, social interaction, start, strength, telling
In my 20s: I’m gonna live forever! In my 40s: uh oh!

2 months ago

20s, 40s, aging, forever, humor, life, live, oh, optimism, reality, uh

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

20 shares on TikTok this month:

I’m ugly but I can make u laugh.

12 shares on Instagram this month:

“Too much garlic”? What’s next? Too much love? Too much desire?

31 shares on Discord this month:

Mouse in a conference call: hold on, I’m gonna put you on squeakerphone.

27 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Freddie Mercury, Venus Williams, and Bruno Mars walk into a bar. They didn’t planet that way.

84 shares on TikTok this month:

If Stranger Things was British, it would be called ‘Bit odd, innit?’

34 shares on Instagram this month:

Behind every robot that turns evil is an engineer who specifically installed red LEDs into the eyes just for this scenario.

40 shares on Messenger this month:

I know my limits. I don’t always obey them, but I know them.

81 shares on Discord this month:

Comments other people make during a movie are annoying. Comments I make during a movie enhance the experience.

88 shares on Discord this month:

Friday the 13th used to mean something. Now every day is awful.

43 shares on Instagram this month:

People text “Happy New Year” and go missing for the rest of the year!

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇴🇲 has shared:

My boyfriend is mad at me because I keep replying with a fire extinguisher emoji to every girl that comments with a flame emoji on his pictures.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has viewed:

Went to HR to complain about my coworkers but my mom said she can’t fire my kids.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

My favorite thing to do is nothing.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has downloaded:

Jesus spent his time among the mentally ill, the poor and unemployed, the prostitutes. So, in a way, by being on Twitter, we’re like Jesus.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has bookmarked:

Every morning I regret why I didn’t sleep earlier the night before.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has bookmarked:

Nice thing about dating a doctor is if you wanna stop seeing them, you can just eat an apple.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has shared:

No one comes off looking worse than the third party who was asked to interfere in a couple fight.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has downloaded:

My ducks: in a row. My elephant: addressed. My eggs: several baskets. My bigger fish: fried.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has viewed:

College core: you sit in the class for attendance, then go home and teach yourself.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has shared:

If you don’t have anything nice to say, sign up for Twitter.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Discord:

He who laughs last didn’t get it.

Just shared via Twitch:

Going out with 38% battery and no boyfriend.

Seen just now on Instagram:

I generally don’t know what the hell I’m doing, but I’m really good at it.

Just shared via TikTok:

I’m not fat. I’m just easy to see.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

90% of my thoughts start with: “What can I eat now?”

Breaking via Reddit:

Oh, I shouldn’t worry? Why didn’t I think of that?

Going viral on Discord:

My wife just pulled me into the other room, and I thought she wanted to have a serious talk, but she just wanted to give me M&M’s without the kids seeing.

Trending via Messenger:

The enemy of my enemy is my friend. But I’m my own worst enemy, so I guess I’m also my best friend.

Making waves on Messenger:

They should invent something in between coffee and narcotics.

Just shared via WeChat:

White elephant: Nothing brings people together like fighting over absolute garbage.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

“You just want an easy life.” Should I want a difficult one?

Related Funny Posts 🤝

You should introduce your upper lip to your bottom lip sometime and shut up.

Authenticity is whispered, but bullshit is broadcasted.

Preparing for the apocalypse by becoming fluent in zombie.

Did the people you had a crush on always like you back or are you funny?

You know it’s bad when people start telling you, you are the strongest person they’ve ever met.

In my 20s: I’m gonna live forever! In my 40s: uh oh!

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨