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Commentary:
I survived the ultimate childhood triathlon: outrunning dogs, dodging goats, and escaping the relentless beak of the wild chicken! 🐶🐐🐔😂

animal, animal chase, chase, chased, chicken, childhood, complete, dog, even, funny memory, goat, memory, worse

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

It’s leg day. No, not at the gym, dummy. I’m shaving them.

1 month ago

day, fitness, gym, humor, joke, leg, leg day, misunderstanding, self-care, shaving
Many people love saying, “Get these away from me,” after eating a few chips.

2 months ago

after, away, chip, chips, craving, eating, food, humor, love, me, people, reaction, saying, snack
People said follow your dreams, so I went back to bed.

3 months ago

back, bed, dream, dreams, follow, humor, i, motivation, people, procrastination, sleep
Girlhood is taking hundreds of pictures only to post one or none at all.

4 months ago

decision making, girlhood, humor, media, none, only, patience, photo, photography, picture, pictures, post, posting, selfie, social, social media, taking
My neighbor said he heard me having sex today but it was just me standing in front of my air conditioner.

2 months ago

air, air conditioner, conditioner, embarrassment, front, funny moment, having, humor, just, me, misunderstanding, moment, neighbor, noise, relationship, sex, standing, today
Being a procrastinator and a perfectionist means you’re stressed about work … that you haven’t even started yet.

1 month ago

anxiety, being, delay, even, humor, means, perfectionist, procrastinator, productivity, started, stress, work

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

98 shares on X this month:

Me: I’m an introvert. Vodka: No, you’re not.

87 shares on Discord this month:

Them: You post a lot. What am I supposed to do here – fold laundry on the timeline?

19 shares on Pinterest this month:

What is it called when you were overthinking, and it turns out you were right?

82 shares on Slack this month:

Arguing through text will have you standing in one spot for 40 mins.

64 shares on Twitch this month:

What song lyric resonates with you the most? Mine is “we’re tiny, we’re toony, we’re all a little loony”

75 shares on TikTok this month:

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice? Also shame on you. Stop foolin’ me, I am pure.

60 shares on WhatsApp this month:

“You just want an easy life.” Should I want a difficult one?

68 shares on Pinterest this month:

If she reads Bukowski, she’s not looking for love. She’s looking for someone who will ruin her creatively.

15 shares on TikTok this month:

Nothing humbles you faster than your phone slipping out of your hand and hitting your face.

35 shares on Instagram this month:

Weekends are a scam, you spend one day exhausted and the other day anxious. Like, what the hell was that?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇼 has copied:

Technically, all restaurants are drive-thru, it just depends how committed to the task you are.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has downloaded:

All my passwords are protected by short term memory loss.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has shared:

The most difficult thing you’ll do as a parent is not rearrange the ornaments after the kids put them on the tree.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has copied:

Hot person: wow, everyone here is so nice.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has shared:

Some days you’re the shit and some days you’re the fan.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

Men be like, “You’ve been different ever since I disrespected you.”

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

People believe that they have brains but maybe that’s just inside their heads.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has copied:

I hate the saying: “Get up, the sun is shining!” What am I supposed to do? Photosynthesis?

Someone from 🇹🇴 has shared:

If she says “so just what exactly is THAT supposed to mean”, you’re gonna have a bad time.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

No longer praying on your downfall. I will be directly involved.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Messenger:

You’re in her DMs, she’s in my bed whining that it’s too cold. Can you come get her?

Going viral on Snapchat:

I hate math, but I love counting money.

Shared recently on YouTube:

“Pre” means before, and “post” means after. Using both at the same time would be preposterous.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Love how Batman: The Animated Series seems to take place in the 40s and the 50s and the 70s and the 90s all at once.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

I’ll make direct eye contact while eating a hot dog, just to make you feel weird.

Spotted on Messenger:

Gonna tell my dentist that if I’m late, he should start without me.

Making waves on Twitch:

Therapy isn’t gonna cut it, I need vengeance.

Trending via Discord:

THRILLED to announce I did an Ironman this weekend! Attended 3 social gatherings in 3 days.

Live now on Discord:

Accessories can really boost a woman’s self-confidence. For example, I know I would feel 10x sexier if I carried a sword with me at all times.

Just landed via Discord:

Nothing guarantees running into someone you know in public better than looking like a feral animal on two hours of sleep.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Your childhood wasn’t complete unless you were chased by a dog… or a goat… or even worse, a chicken.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

It’s leg day. No, not at the gym, dummy. I’m shaving them.

Many people love saying, “Get these away from me,” after eating a few chips.

People said follow your dreams, so I went back to bed.

Girlhood is taking hundreds of pictures only to post one or none at all.

My neighbor said he heard me having sex today but it was just me standing in front of my air conditioner.

Being a procrastinator and a perfectionist means you’re stressed about work … that you haven’t even started yet.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨