Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Bought a house plant so I wouldn’t be the only one dying of dehydration around here.
  • Science has enough bodies, I’m donating mine to English lit just to spice things up a bit.
  • I told my psychiatrist I’ve been hearing voices lately. He told me I don’t have a psychiatrist.
  • Be the reason why a count unleashes ancient horrors onto the world when he thinks of you.
  • I can’t blame this generation too much for doing stupid stuff. My generation thought seven Police Academy movies were a good idea.
  • I don’t have kids or a dog. What can I bring into a bar that will make everyone mad?