Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Might quit my job to focus on actually putting away my laundry.
  • Welcome to your 40s. Your ability to be sneaky will now be hindered by your bones cracking when you walk.
  • I haven’t had sex in so long, I forgot how to moan, what if I mess up and bark?
  • I’m sorry you had a bad experience at our restaurant. To make it up to you, here is a coupon for more of our terrible, terrible food.
  • Once you find a pair of pants that fit you perfectly, it’s over for all your other pants.
  • If I’m too much for you, then go and find less.